Q : Art and musics should not be mandatory at school, agree/disagree?
It is a common belief that art and music is not imperative subject at school.
However, I firmly believe that those subjects is essential to the students.
This is because those subjects are enable to foster their creativity and give opportunities for students to relive their stress.
To begin with, Learning art and music at school can strength student’s creativity.
There is a research shows that learning those subjects help to improve their imagination as well. It is very beneficial to solve many kinds of problems that could occurs in their daily life. This is because the imagination can lead to flexibly deal with serious problems.
On top of that, This can give opportunities for students to relieve their stress.
In Korea, Students feel obsession with good grades for going to the good university.
And they should spend the most of the time studying other subjects that important to go to the university.
This contributes to increase of suicide rate among students. And it is the most serious problem in Korea nowadays.
The article from students magazine shows a result that 90% of respondent that consist of students who aged 14 to 18 can ease of their body and mind by taking a class of art and music.
And It is very helpful to decrease their stress and can more concentrate other subjects as well.
To sum up, Teaching art and musics is beneficial to the students.
For these reasons, the school should teach of art and music to their students for raising students creativity and relieving their stress.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 36, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'enabled'.
Suggestion: enabled
...ts. This is because those subjects are enable to foster their creativity and give opp...
^^^^^^
Line 6, column 10, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'research'.
Suggestion: research
...h student's creativity. There is a research shows that learning those subjects help...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 164, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[2]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'occur'
Suggestion: occur
...solve many kinds of problems that could occurs in their daily life. This is because th...
^^^^^^
Line 19, column 91, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...and music to their students for raising students creativity and relieving their stress. ...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, so, well, to begin with, to sum up, on top of that
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 13.1623246493 84% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 7.30460921844 123% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 24.0651302605 129% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 38.0 41.998997996 90% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.3376753507 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1296.0 1615.20841683 80% => OK
No of words: 259.0 315.596192385 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.00386100386 5.12529762239 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.01166760082 4.20363070211 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65355759284 2.80592935109 95% => OK
Unique words: 131.0 176.041082164 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.505791505792 0.561755894193 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 376.2 506.74238477 74% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 0.809619238477 371% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.2975951904 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.5519784443 49.4020404114 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 81.0 106.682146367 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.1875 20.7667163134 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.25 7.06120827912 60% => OK
Paragraphs: 13.0 4.38176352705 297% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.154526212465 0.244688304435 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0619748123847 0.084324248473 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0971114611054 0.0667982634062 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0762766921658 0.151304729494 50% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.102547727346 0.056905535591 180% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 13.0946893788 78% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 50.2224549098 127% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 11.3001002004 74% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.42 12.4159519038 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.54 8.58950901804 88% => OK
difficult_words: 51.0 78.4519038076 65% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 9.78957915832 72% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.1190380762 83% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.7795591182 74% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum five paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.