Successful sports stars and glamorous film stars are a role model for youngsters. Do u support it or not? (Agree/Disagree)
Every country has its own sport superstars and glamorous film stars. We get to read about them, see them on television and follow them on social media like Twitter and Snapchat. However, using them as role models for youngsters is a much debated topic amongst journalists, scholars and educationists.
I am the of the strong opinion that while sports superstars are ideal role models for the younger generations, the same cannot be interpreted from glamorous film stars.
In a country like Australia, sports play an important role in all walks of life. People love sports and live by it. Every sport is played and followed with the utmost passion. Footy( National rugby league) and Origins, Australian football league(AFL), Rugby, Swimming, Formula 1 racing, Rowing, Tennis, Basketball Cycling and not forgetting Cricket has many talented players with a huge following. Children are introduced to sports in schools but primarily in the homefront by their parents or older siblings. By watching their favourite sport and their ever favourite sportsman inspires these young children to thrive on becoming the same iwhe they grow up. The efforts taken by Jonathan Thurston, Ian Thorpe, Gianne Rooney, Darren Lockyar, Mel Meninga, Daniel Ricciardo and certain cricketers like Allan Border, Ricky Ponting, Shane Warne and Michael Clerke by visiting schools, talking to the students and telling them how they did it and what it takes to become great sportsmen is truly commendable. Having greats like Jonathan Thurston and Patty Mills representing the indigenous population of Australia has inspired those from such ethnic backgrounds to seek careers in sport.
Similarly, many teenagers and adolescents who pursue a career in acting or the movies have glamorous film stars as their role models. However, it is an undeniable fact that most of these film stars are laced with controversy and scandal. Substance abuse, alcoholism, infidelity and corruption are some of the issues hovering celebrities making them improper role models to the young generation. They fail to realise beneath the glamour there is doom similar to the idiom 'everything that shines is not gold'. Still there are plenty that become blinded by this fake but glamorous lifestyle and end up being mislead.
In conclusion, children seeking ideal role models should be educated on the perils which accompany a famous movie star versus the hardship and dedication that requires to become a sports star. this will equip them with the necessary tools and skills to decide independently as to who should be their ideal star.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 217, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...Footy National rugby league and Origins, Australian football leagueAFL, Rugby, Sw...
^^
Line 5, column 743, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...orpe, Gianne Rooney, Darren Lockyar, Mel Meninga, Daniel Ricciardo and certain cr...
^^
Line 7, column 298, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...coholism, infidelity and corruption are some of the issues hovering celebrities making them...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 508, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Still,
...iom everything that shines is not gold. Still there are plenty that become blinded by...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 169, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'becoming'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'require' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: becoming
...e hardship and dedication that requires to become a sports star. this will equip them wit...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 194, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
... that requires to become a sports star. this will equip them with the necessary tool...
^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'however', 'if', 'similarly', 'so', 'still', 'while', 'as to', 'in conclusion']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.318777292576 0.247107183377 129% => OK
Verbs: 0.144104803493 0.155533422707 93% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0807860262009 0.0946595960268 85% => OK
Adverbs: 0.028384279476 0.0501214627716 57% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0480349344978 0.0437548338989 110% => OK
Prepositions: 0.0982532751092 0.122226691241 80% => OK
Participles: 0.0545851528384 0.0403226058552 135% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.64056877633 2.80594681477 94% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0262008733624 0.0326793684256 80% => OK
Particles: 0.00218340611354 0.00163938923432 133% => OK
Determiners: 0.0764192139738 0.0861772015684 89% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00873362445415 0.021408717616 41% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0131004366812 0.011925033212 110% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2589.0 1933.35771543 134% => OK
No of words: 413.0 316.048096192 131% => OK
Chars per words: 6.26876513317 6.12580529183 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50803742585 4.20517956788 107% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.406779661017 0.374742101984 109% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.290556900726 0.28420135186 102% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.213075060533 0.203846283523 105% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.135593220339 0.137316102897 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64056877633 2.80594681477 94% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 176.037074148 145% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.61985472155 0.56093040696 111% => OK
Word variations: 78.8341013735 60.7387585426 130% => OK
How many sentences: 19.0 16.0891783567 118% => OK
Sentence length: 21.7368421053 20.7743622355 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 67.0979769006 49.517814964 136% => OK
Chars per sentence: 136.263157895 127.492653851 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7368421053 20.7743622355 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.473684210526 0.814263465372 58% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38877755511 114% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 3.99599198397 150% => OK
Readability: 50.7925321779 49.1944974215 103% => OK
Elegance: 2.13861386139 1.69124875643 126% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.228510834488 0.332605444948 69% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0846228900738 0.102741220458 82% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0544292716854 0.0668466124924 81% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.502366056262 0.534860350844 94% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.180574422184 0.148594505496 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.08947050375 0.134430193775 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0615055516627 0.0742795772207 83% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.211831342068 0.324371583561 65% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.105513349387 0.0638462369009 165% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.148242975527 0.228012699653 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0546782768872 0.058150111329 94% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.68436873747 161% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.41683366733 59% => OK
Positive topic words: 13.0 5.90881763527 220% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 2.5751503006 39% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 1.9629258517 102% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 10.4468937876 153% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.