As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Market share and revenue aside, companies are supposed to take social responsibilities. In my opinion, I totally support this perspective as caring about other social aspects besides profit margin could benefit businesses in the long run.
Firstly, by holding society-devoted campaigns, organizations could raise their brand identification among their target customers, especially in remote areas where usual advertising campaigns nearly can not reach. A prime example of this is the school milk programme established by TH true milk in Nghe An. Before this campaign, this brand is unawared by people living in mountainous regions, however, by offering every schoolchildren in Nghe An a daily source of fresh milk without emphasizing the profit rate, TH true milk has now become a household name in this province. Moreover, long-term gains could come when companies put their customers’ well-being first instead of their benefit cost ratio. For instance, by changing the menu and ingredients used to produce healthier food, Mc Donalds has stood the test of time to become the market leader in the fast food industry when people are caring more and more about their health.
On the other hand, social issues and environmental problems happen if businessmen ignore social responsibilities and take priority in making money since their income could come from damaging natural resources or harming other people’s benefits. Formosa ha tinh steel corporation is a telling example for this as they reduced production cost by discharging contaminated water into the sea, thus causing the widespread death of several marine species and severe losses to the fishery industry of many areas. Another disadvantage is losing brand reputation with business lessons from Facebook. As this firm getting more and more users, it started to sell its customers’ private information to marketing agencies, therefore, when this truth being revealed, Facebook losed a significant amount of users and no longer won the trust of the remaining ones.
In summary, besides monetary gains, companies should concentrate on social benefits, especially the benefits of their clients. By practising this, they can survive and thrive in the long term.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 303, Rule ID: THE_SENT_END[1]
Message: Did you forget something after 'An'?
...mme established by TH true milk in Nghe An. Before this campaign, this brand is una...
^^^
Line 3, column 443, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'An' or 'a' is left.
Suggestion: An; A
...y offering every schoolchildren in Nghe An a daily source of fresh milk without emph...
^^^^
Line 5, column 182, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...money since their income could come from damaging natural resources or harming ot...
^^
Line 5, column 539, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ny areas. Another disadvantage is losing brand reputation with business lessons f...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, firstly, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, thus, well, for instance, in summary, in my opinion, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 13.1623246493 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 7.85571142285 89% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 7.30460921844 55% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 24.0651302605 91% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 41.998997996 112% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1891.0 1615.20841683 117% => OK
No of words: 343.0 315.596192385 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.51311953353 5.12529762239 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.30351707066 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.92345839391 2.80592935109 104% => OK
Unique words: 223.0 176.041082164 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.650145772595 0.561755894193 116% => OK
syllable_count: 579.6 506.74238477 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.76152304609 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 16.0721442886 75% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 20.2975951904 138% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 86.7782934968 49.4020404114 176% => OK
Chars per sentence: 157.583333333 106.682146367 148% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.5833333333 20.7667163134 138% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.0833333333 7.06120827912 157% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.67935871743 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0731048876527 0.244688304435 30% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0303365632451 0.084324248473 36% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0394397962469 0.0667982634062 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.050958255128 0.151304729494 34% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0315201057181 0.056905535591 55% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.8 13.0946893788 144% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 34.6 50.2224549098 69% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.4 11.3001002004 136% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.27 12.4159519038 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.27 8.58950901804 120% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 78.4519038076 145% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 9.78957915832 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.1190380762 130% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.7795591182 139% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 11.2359550562 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.