being a celebrity brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefit or more problems?
According to a recent questionnaire in Iran, most of teenagers have a dream of being fame in their future’s careers such as movie industry, sports or art and so on. It is true that when people become a celebrity, they face to different sorts of advantages and disadvantages. As a whole, I believe that its drawbacks outweigh its benefits.
Being a famous is a very sweet sense. People try to win competitions of their majors to taste this sense. When you are a celebrity, you play a significant role in society since people especial your advocated followers are very affected by you. It’s a powerful tool to change community’s mindset according to your favorite one. Another important argument in its favor is higher income. Famous people are having higher income to compare people who are unknown even with better performance. So, reputation can bring you treasure and wealthy. For example, an athletic who is popular always get donation even three times of infamous.
On the other hand, there are some drawbacks that are resulted from being known in society. Firstly, you don’t have a normal life at all. To be more specific, your life is always monitored by journalists and ordinary people who are your fan. For instance, you couldn’t bring your children to amusement park without any reflex from society or your followers. They will come to you and want to take a picture or sign on their notebook for memorialist. Secondly, being a famous is like a short trip that comes to end very soon so backing to your ex-life is a very hard step. At last but not least, gossip always threat your life and your career, too. In another word, a tiny mistake can draw critics to you and you have to have a thicker skin against them.
In conclusion, it seems to me that although being popular can bring you a lot of advantage include wealthy and popularity but its disadvantages are more than. So it is not worthwhile to be fame.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 46, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the teenagers') or simply say ''most teenagers''.
Suggestion: most of the teenagers; most teenagers
...ding to a recent questionnaire in Iran, most of teenagers have a dream of being fame in their fut...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 7, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN[2]
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
...drawbacks outweigh its benefits. Being a famous is a very sweet sense. People try to wi...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 630, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... donation even three times of infamous. On the other hand, there are some drawba...
^^^
Line 3, column 466, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN[2]
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
...tebook for memorialist. Secondly, being a famous is like a short trip that comes to end ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 196, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an. So it is not worthwhile to be fame.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, it is true, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 13.1623246493 175% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 24.0651302605 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 44.0 41.998997996 105% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1597.0 1615.20841683 99% => OK
No of words: 337.0 315.596192385 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.73887240356 5.12529762239 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28457229495 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66566965604 2.80592935109 95% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 176.041082164 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.572700296736 0.561755894193 102% => OK
syllable_count: 511.2 506.74238477 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 5.43587174349 184% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 16.0721442886 131% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.2975951904 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.8968666323 49.4020404114 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.0476190476 106.682146367 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.0476190476 20.7667163134 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.38095238095 7.06120827912 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.01903807615 100% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 8.67935871743 207% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.158562457124 0.244688304435 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0485972688231 0.084324248473 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.050045165576 0.0667982634062 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.109778427256 0.151304729494 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0642347686404 0.056905535591 113% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.9 13.0946893788 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 50.2224549098 127% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 11.3001002004 74% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 12.4159519038 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.85 8.58950901804 91% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 78.4519038076 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 9.78957915832 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.1190380762 83% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 46, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the teenagers') or simply say ''most teenagers''.
Suggestion: most of the teenagers; most teenagers
...ding to a recent questionnaire in Iran, most of teenagers have a dream of being fame in their fut...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 7, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN[2]
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
...drawbacks outweigh its benefits. Being a famous is a very sweet sense. People try to wi...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 630, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... donation even three times of infamous. On the other hand, there are some drawba...
^^^
Line 3, column 466, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN[2]
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
...tebook for memorialist. Secondly, being a famous is like a short trip that comes to end ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 196, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an. So it is not worthwhile to be fame.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, it is true, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 13.1623246493 175% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 24.0651302605 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 44.0 41.998997996 105% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1597.0 1615.20841683 99% => OK
No of words: 337.0 315.596192385 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.73887240356 5.12529762239 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28457229495 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66566965604 2.80592935109 95% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 176.041082164 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.572700296736 0.561755894193 102% => OK
syllable_count: 511.2 506.74238477 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 5.43587174349 184% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 16.0721442886 131% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.2975951904 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.8968666323 49.4020404114 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.0476190476 106.682146367 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.0476190476 20.7667163134 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.38095238095 7.06120827912 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.01903807615 100% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 8.67935871743 207% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.158562457124 0.244688304435 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0485972688231 0.084324248473 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.050045165576 0.0667982634062 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.109778427256 0.151304729494 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0642347686404 0.056905535591 113% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.9 13.0946893788 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 50.2224549098 127% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 11.3001002004 74% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 12.4159519038 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.85 8.58950901804 91% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 78.4519038076 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 9.78957915832 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.1190380762 83% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.