Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
These days, celebrities have convenient and salubrious life on the ground that people support them in different way. In this regard, there is a long-standing discussion among sociologist about people's attention to celebrities. Some sociologist believe that young people pay much attention to celebrities. others however advocate the idea that celebrities are more important to old people, because they have more free time to spend on recreation. I personally, concur with the former. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most important reasons.
To begin with, young people spend their leisure time to participate in different activities and events. they go to concert, theater, and stadium, to name but a few to have fun and spend their free time. they spend lots of money to see specific celebrity and enjoy his/her art and talents. As opposed to older people who prefer stay at home in their free time. this clearly demonstrates that celebrities are successful to give attention of young people.
Second of all, juvenile keep track of celebrities to find the best way for success. they consider celebrities as prosperous person who have obtained lots of money and popularity, so they attempt to follow their track to become successful like them. For example, my brother is fond of one of my country's athletes whose name is Ali Karimi. he wish to become popular athlete like him, so he has started to study his biography to find out key factors that assist him to be famous. my father, on the other hand, blames my brother and tells him that you should continue your own way that is pursuing master degree.
To sum up, celebrities’ life depends on their fans and if people do not support them, they cannot keep on their work. The majority of a celebrity's fans involves young people who not only value art and aesthetic, but also consider celebrities as a successful person. this is why I support celebrities' importance to young people.
- tpo 24 80
- Some people believe that in order to be effective, political leaders must yield to public opinion and abandon principle for the sake of compromise. Others believe that the most essential quality of an effective leader is the ability to remain consistently 50
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 245, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'believes'.
Suggestion: believes
...ention to celebrities. Some sociologist believe that young people pay much attention to...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 306, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Others
...ople pay much attention to celebrities. others however advocate the idea that celebrit...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 105, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...ate in different activities and events. they go to concert, theater, and stadium, to...
^^^^
Line 5, column 204, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
... to have fun and spend their free time. they spend lots of money to see specific cel...
^^^^
Line 5, column 290, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...rity and enjoy his/her art and talents. As opposed to older people who prefer stay...
^^
Line 5, column 361, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...prefer stay at home in their free time. this clearly demonstrates that celebrities a...
^^^^
Line 9, column 85, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...ities to find the best way for success. they consider celebrities as prosperous pers...
^^^^
Line 9, column 339, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...trys athletes whose name is Ali Karimi. he wish to become popular athlete like him...
^^
Line 9, column 342, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wishes'.
Suggestion: wishes
...s athletes whose name is Ali Karimi. he wish to become popular athlete like him, so ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 478, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: My
...y factors that assist him to be famous. my father, on the other hand, blames my br...
^^
Line 13, column 272, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...der celebrities as a successful person. this is why I support celebrities importance...
^^^^
Line 13, column 294, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'celebrities'' or 'celebrity's'?
Suggestion: celebrities'; celebrity's
...uccessful person. this is why I support celebrities importance to young people.
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, second, so, for example, to begin with, to sum up, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1644.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 328.0 407.700716846 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01219512195 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.25567506705 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7725804872 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 212.727598566 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.564024390244 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 507.6 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.9510532861 48.9658058833 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.5263157895 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.2631578947 20.6045352989 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.84210526316 5.45110844103 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.5376344086 217% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.169581077409 0.236089414692 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0552842755609 0.076458572812 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0341270589981 0.0737576698707 46% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107167308173 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0440820874964 0.0645574589148 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.48 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 86.8835125448 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.