Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
How much do people have to work to buy a car? This is an important questions when we talk about being responsible with the money. Some people believe that young people should become financially independent at a young age; whereas others think is too much responsibility to manage money when being so young. In my view, in order to be independent financially talking, teenager must learn to manage their money.
First, people need to learn the value of money. To learn ways to save or spend money, kids need to stop being dependents of the parent. For example, my sister started working as a teacher assistant, when she was 18 years old. Although she still lived with us, Luz paid her own bills. I remember that she had to make her own groceries. Consequently, my sister knew how to invest her money. I am never going to forget one time we went to the movie theater the whole family. However, Luz could not go because she had already spent her money going to parties. Years later, my sister told me that lesson helped her to know how to control her income more efficient than before and it was the most vital lesson my parents have tough her. Thus, Luz understood through her own life how to be responsible and spend the money wisely.
In addition to grasp the value of money, being responsible with the money provides people’s experiences. Therefore, errors help you to become stronger for the future. For instance, I decided to buy a car from a previous owner instead of a dealer. Although my parents tried to advise me about the car, I did not hear them. As a result, my parents let me do so because I said I work for it, and I could take my own decisions. In the beginning, the car was out of defects as a new car is. I was excited about since I bought my own car with the payment of my first job. However, in my second week of using the car, it stopped working. The old owner sold me a refurbish automobile. He practically stole my money. In that moment, I realized was a huge mistake. Even though I managed my money, I should have thought everything better. I learned from my error and became even stronger from that situation.
To sum up, young people should be economically responsible in order to grow. Managing money aid children to understand the value of money, but also make them stronger from the experience they live. When I have a child, I will let him work since a young age.
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I realized was a huge mistake.
I realized it was a huge mistake.
flaws:
The essay is not exactly right on the topic. It should be about 'children', not your sister or yourself.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? in 30
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 30 15
No. of Words: 439 350
No. of Characters: 1894 1500
No. of Different Words: 222 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.577 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.314 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.4 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 111 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 74 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.633 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.689 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.533 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.302 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.44 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.194 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5