Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, the presence of computer games has adsolved almost all our children’s enjoyment time, that is an unquestionable fact. it is quite common to see youngsters in front of their computer for hours, even without eating or taking a rest. Whether they are wasting their time palying video games or not, is a matter of intense debate. As far as I am concerned, I firmly believe that kind of enjoyment is not healthy for kids, and should be closely controled by the parents. this position is based on two main reason, which will be analyzed thoroughly below.
First of all, the video games undermine their communicational development. this is a fact which could be readily comprobated, just we need to see the interaction between children in a school. those who are used to interact with other people, are normally more talkative and dinamic, as a result of more developed social skills. On the other hand, those who are shy and introvert, it is as a consequense of a lack of social ability, which allow them to make friend o even keep a conversation in a natural way. it is true that the video games are not the only cause of this phenomenon, but it a remarkable factor of it, due to the inumerable amount of time children spend on it, which could be used in other activities like playing team sport, which enrich the their social abilities and improve their health.
Secondly, non of the skills that the kids develop playin video games are usefull in their future as professionals. The childhood is short period of time, which should be used not only to make that kids grow strong, but also to prepare them to their future. there are tens of professions that need to be development since quite young, such as sports or musical skills. An compelling example of that the history of my brother John. since he was a child, my parents noticed that he has a extraordinary abilities for the music. To make a long history short, thanks to they understand that and help him to nuture it, today he is a brillant guitar interpreter. but, if he was spend all that time playing video games instead practicing, he would no the rewarded artists that he is today.
In summation, I am of the opinion that there are hundred of more productives activities for kids than playing in the computer, which ensure a better future, or make them a better person. that is why that the best advice that I could give to today young people is focus more on those activitie which enrich your live, not on those who do not apport nothing tho it.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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...t time, that is an unquestionable fact. it is quite common to see youngsters in fr...
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...ld be closely controled by the parents. this position is based on two main reason, w...
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...will be analyzed thoroughly below. First of all, the video games undermine ...
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...mine their communicational development. this is a fact which could be readily compro...
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...teraction between children in a school. those who are used to interact with other peo...
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Line 9, column 492, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a natural way" with adverb for "natural"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... make friend o even keep a conversation in a natural way. it is true that the video games are no...
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...n keep a conversation in a natural way. it is true that the video games are not th...
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...s like playing team sport, which enrich the their social abilities and improve their heal...
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...bilities and improve their health. Secondly, non of the skills that the kid...
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...s professionals. The childhood is short period of time, which should be used not only to make ...
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...t also to prepare them to their future. there are tens of professions that need to be...
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...oung, such as sports or musical skills. An compelling example of that the history ...
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...of that the history of my brother John. since he was a child, my parents noticed that...
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...a child, my parents noticed that he has a extraordinary abilities for the music. ...
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...nts noticed that he has a extraordinary abilities for the music. To make a long history s...
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...ay he is a brillant guitar interpreter. but, if he was spend all that time playing ...
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Line 17, column 671, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
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Suggestion: spent
...lant guitar interpreter. but, if he was spend all that time playing video games inste...
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Suggestion: now
...ideo games instead practicing, he would no the rewarded artists that he is today. ...
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...rewarded artists that he is today. In summation, I am of the opinion that t...
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...ion, I am of the opinion that there are hundred of more productives activities for kids...
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...r future, or make them a better person. that is why that the best advice that I coul...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, secondly, so, kind of, such as, as a result, first of all, it is true, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 15.1003584229 192% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 11.0286738351 236% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 58.0 43.0788530466 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2104.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 449.0 407.700716846 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.6859688196 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60321845022 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64163382676 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 229.0 212.727598566 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.510022271715 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 655.2 618.680645161 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.3608169523 48.9658058833 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.736842105 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.6315789474 20.6045352989 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.21052631579 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 21.0 5.5376344086 379% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.203584743928 0.236089414692 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.056246172644 0.076458572812 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0362534346289 0.0737576698707 49% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.115781568805 0.150856017488 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0279146514277 0.0645574589148 43% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 11.7677419355 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.22 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 86.8835125448 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.