Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The period in one's life that is often referred to as young adulthood is perhaps one of the most crucial durations in an individual existence. Throughout these years, fundamental traits and points of views are solidified in teens' mind, making them ready to mature and become full grown adults. In my view, it is of utmost importance that parents assist their teenage children so that they can get involved in a part-time job at that age. I feel this way for two main reasons which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, taking a job (preferably not a full-time one) will present a great opportunity for teenagers to gain an invaluable experience early on in their life. To be more specific, they will become familiar with the principal differences of the working environment with what they had experienced in their homes. How to run a business, when to ask your boss for a leave, how is increasing your efficiency possible and many others are among numerous nuances that no school will ever teach students, and are necessary for one to become successful at a career.
Secondly, having an occupation while still being an adolescent will encourage a number of constructive characteristics and behaviors in a person. Financial accountability, being one of those, is an ability that an adult does not possess, might lead to catastrophic mistakes or unnecessary expenses. For instance, my father who I personally admire for his fiscal adroitness always used to tell me about how being involved in a partial vocation allowed him to conceive the true merit of money. Being 13 when first selling hamburgers at a local fast food restaurant, was, of course, challenging for him but a price worth paying. He soon understood that he ought not to waste his hard-earned cash on things that are not really required. Instead, a tendency for saving and accurately investing his capital on small scale ventures that could make profits for him began to develop in him. Consequently, at age 21 he was able to buy an apartment of his own and during his time at college, he would support his parents financially. As you can see, Had it not been for his efforts as a teenager to enter the job market, he would not have been able to become independent at such an age.
In sum, while some may disagree, I strongly hold the view that young adults should seek a part-time occupation as soon as possible. Not only will it have a positive influence on their later life as adults who have full-time careers, but also this is going to leave a long-lasting positive effect on their personality.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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The period in ones life that is often re...
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Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
The period in ones life that is often referred to as young...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...will explore in the following essay. To begin with, taking a job preferably n...
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Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... to become successful at a career. Secondly, having an occupation while sti...
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Line 8, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...o become independent at such an age. In sum, while some may disagree, I stron...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, may, really, second, secondly, so, still, while, for instance, i feel, of course, in my view, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2141.0 1977.66487455 108% => OK
No of words: 446.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80044843049 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80822502887 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 262.0 212.727598566 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.587443946188 0.524837075471 112% => OK
syllable_count: 676.8 618.680645161 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 33.9392903951 48.9658058833 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.941176471 100.406767564 125% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.2352941176 20.6045352989 127% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.41176470588 5.45110844103 154% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.231965766508 0.236089414692 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0708970013194 0.076458572812 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0561448236515 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.145821112168 0.150856017488 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0485285078879 0.0645574589148 75% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 11.7677419355 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.82 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 86.8835125448 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.