Do you agree or disagree that students should be encouraged to do part time job?
Teenage is the time they prepare to start their new life and become independent. There are many ways parents can help children raise children by providing money for education, teaching the values of relationships. However, I believe that encouraging them in a part time job can make tremendous changes in their teens. I think this way for many reasons.
First of all, by doing a part time job can ensure your children know the value of each penny and to spend wisely. If they start earning without parents dependence, they are unlikely to spend for unnecessary objects like buying new model expensive cars, T-shirts. For instance, my elder daughter, who is 18, goes for a part time job after regular school classes. She is well aware of her spending expenditure, as she keeps records on each material she buys and also saves some for her future studies. Thus, by doing a part time job, we as a parents are not only teaching them the value of money, but also to spend wisely.
Furthermore, they learn to be more mature and independent once they start earning money. They no longer depend on parents for buying books or cars that they need. For instance, when I was in twelfth grade, I used to work as a cashier in a famous restaurant near my hometown. Once started working, I no longer was dependent on parents for my college tuition or daily needs like money for gas or buying books. On the other hand, If I depend on my parents, I would never be living life the way I want, as I have to always ask money to dad for even simple things. So working part time helped me become independent.
In conclusion, Working part time during teenage years has a huge role in once fife. As they help you to become independent and help to know the value of money you earn. So these are reasons why I think encouraging part time jobs is important to prepare yourself as an individual.
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|---|---|---|---|
| 2024-08-25 | pezhmanlamei | 73 | view |
| 2023-12-13 | jimHsu | 76 | view |
| 2023-12-07 | butterflyluo | 80 | view |
| 2023-12-07 | butterflyluo | 66 | view |
| 2023-12-07 | butterflyluo | 66 | view |
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 261, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...r, I believe that encouraging them in a part time job can make tremendous changes in thei...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 27, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...y reasons. First of all, by doing a part time job can ensure your children know the...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 44, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rst of all, by doing a part time job can ensure your children know the value of ...
^^
Line 3, column 57, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...y doing a part time job can ensure your children know the value of each penny a...
^^
Line 3, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r children know the value of each penny and to spend wisely. If they start earni...
^^
Line 3, column 241, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nnecessary objects like buying new model expensive cars, T-shirts. For instance, ...
^^
Line 3, column 312, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... instance, my elder daughter, who is 18, goes for a part time job after regular s...
^^
Line 3, column 325, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... elder daughter, who is 18, goes for a part time job after regular school classes. She i...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 462, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... keeps records on each material she buys and also saves some for her future studi...
^^
Line 3, column 525, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...or her future studies. Thus, by doing a part time job, we as a parents are not only teach...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 546, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a parent' or simply 'parents'?
Suggestion: a parent; parents
.... Thus, by doing a part time job, we as a parents are not only teaching them the value of...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 46, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ermore, they learn to be more mature and independent once they start earning mone...
^^
Line 5, column 281, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...famous restaurant near my hometown. Once started working, I no longer was depende...
^^
Line 5, column 473, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...I depend on my parents, I would never be living life the way I want, as I have to...
^^
Line 5, column 575, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... dad for even simple things. So working part time helped me become independent. In con...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 15, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...me become independent. In conclusion, Working part time during teenage years h...
^^
Line 7, column 25, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...independent. In conclusion, Working part time during teenage years has a huge role in...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 203, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...u earn. So these are reasons why I think encouraging part time jobs is important ...
^^^
Line 7, column 218, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...e are reasons why I think encouraging part time jobs is important to prepare yourself a...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, so, thus, well, for instance, i think, in conclusion, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 11.0286738351 36% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 52.1666666667 71% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1543.0 1977.66487455 78% => OK
No of words: 338.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.5650887574 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28774723029 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48331324007 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.529585798817 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 479.7 618.680645161 78% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 31.6382426039 48.9658058833 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.7222222222 100.406767564 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7777777778 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.16666666667 5.45110844103 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 19.0 5.5376344086 343% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.19206405854 0.236089414692 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0698687459312 0.076458572812 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.075207012567 0.0737576698707 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.128573038565 0.150856017488 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0595589786488 0.0645574589148 92% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.5 11.7677419355 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.23 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.15 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 86.8835125448 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.