In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at a young age.
some people are inclined toward the idea that children should learn to manage their own money to become more financially responsible. However, othere may take the opposite viewpoint and believe that it is not necessary to teach children how to spend their money. In my perspective, it is not possitive to learn children about financial subject since not only there are many other necessary subject to learn them, but also it may have negative effects on them.
The first exquisite point worth mentioning is that children should imporve their knowledge. Nowadays, development of the technology emerges many console game like play station and Children advocate most of their time playing this games. Since children do not have much time left, it is better to force them to study their lesson. If we want to teach children about financial problem, they will miss their assignment. Therefore, it is not crucial for them to learn about finance problem. Moreover, we have to understand that children are really playful at young ages and it is a complex task to teach them how to spend their money because they only think about playing and running.
A further more subtle reason to point is that such responsibily have harmful effects on children. Children should play with each other in their childhood which is important for them. it is possible to learn them how to spend their money but this subject will put them under a lot of pressure at young age which is not good for them. Children have many demanding from their parents and if we refuse their demand, they may be angry. Such behavior will form their adults life and when they grows-up, they tend to be alone and be very aggresive. Moreover, gain information about financial is not a problem for adults since every adult after a certain time learn how to be responsible of his/her money. For example, when my sister was a child my parent buy her every thing she wanted. Nevertheles, when she went to university, she take a part time job. At first she waste all of her income but after two time he learn how to manage her expenses.
To make a long story short, based on the aforementioned arguments, it is not vital to teach children how to spend their money since not only there are more important subject to teach them, but also it may have terrible influence on them.
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign country. 70
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- A/D: “It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.” 76
- tpo21 80
- In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at a young age. 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Some
some people are inclined toward the idea tha...
^^^^
Line 5, column 184, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... childhood which is important for them. it is possible to learn them how to spend ...
^^
Line 5, column 827, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'takes'.
Suggestion: takes
...heles, when she went to university, she take a part time job. At first she waste all...
^^^^
Line 5, column 834, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...when she went to university, she take a part time job. At first she waste all of her inco...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 908, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'learns'.
Suggestion: learns
...all of her income but after two time he learn how to manage her expenses. To make a...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, really, so, therefore, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 43.0788530466 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1924.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 405.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.75061728395 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48604634366 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42727477972 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 212.727598566 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.466666666667 0.524837075471 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 594.0 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.223592446 48.9658058833 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.263157895 100.406767564 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3157894737 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.21052631579 5.45110844103 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.321582670504 0.236089414692 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.107745428769 0.076458572812 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0877026853633 0.0737576698707 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.208349338997 0.150856017488 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0852144980435 0.0645574589148 132% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.27 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.29 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 86.8835125448 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.