People spent too much time on their personal enjoyment-doing things than things they should done
All member of each society and group should do a specific task to improve their group level. They have to do their job to complete their defined mission. Of course, all human needs some extra enjoyment activity to recover and feely happy in order to increase their energy and improve their performance in their job. The balancing between the amount of time spent on personal enjoyment-doing things and the task which has an obligation to do is really challenging. In my own perspective, I do not agree with the statement mentioned in the question topic. Following sentences will elucidate my opinion.
First of all, it is needless to say that, all achievement and success are required enough effort and time which should be spent on specific task. people should spend more time to be sure that their job in respect of quality and quantity has been done adequately. For instance, I worked in a group which should retrofit more than two hundred damage building from the severe earthquake, all team member should work very hard to finish our job on time. there is a famous sentence which said "No pain No Gain" .
Second, bypassing the time, the population increases which attribute a more competitive atmosphere in finding jobs or getting admission from a well-knowing university, etc. People should do their job, exercise, homework, etc to increase their chance of accepting their favorable job or university admission. Nowadays people should scarfices some of their short time of happiness for obtaining great position. For example, in my country, there is an entrance exam for the university with limited acceptance rate. the number of contemplators reached more than one million people, students, in order to be accepted in good university, should study hard enough to acquire top ten percent rank.
it is not deniable, that human require to have fun, it is necessary to increase mental and physical health condition, but it should not be too much to replace the work which was in high priority.
To sum up, I believe that people spend more time on the things they should do, as getting a job and having a well-fare life required sufficient effort. and also by increasing the competition in all aspects of life people should work harder than doing personal enjoyment doing things.
- TPO 20 Integrated, let it burn policy 88
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 147, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: People
...which should be spent on specific task. people should spend more time to be sure that ...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 451, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...rk very hard to finish our job on time. there is a famous sentence which said 'N...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 516, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...e which said 'No pain No Gain' . Second, bypassing the time, the po...
^^
Line 9, column 513, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...niversity with limited acceptance rate. the number of contemplators reached more th...
^^^
Line 13, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... to acquire top ten percent rank. it is not deniable, that human require to ...
^^
Line 17, column 153, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: And
...l-fare life required sufficient effort. and also by increasing the competition in a...
^^^
Line 17, column 285, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... doing personal enjoyment doing things.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, really, second, so, well, for example, for instance, of course, first of all, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 43.0788530466 65% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1930.0 1977.66487455 98% => OK
No of words: 382.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.05235602094 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42095241839 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68871955109 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.552356020942 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 593.1 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.4181861538 48.9658058833 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.222222222 100.406767564 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2222222222 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.05555555556 5.45110844103 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.398259215762 0.236089414692 169% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.118199904285 0.076458572812 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0907309551359 0.0737576698707 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.213656236493 0.150856017488 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0972730028784 0.0645574589148 151% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.01 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 86.8835125448 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.