Nowadays, it has commonly accepted that famous people like any other citizen have this right of desirable privacy. But unfortunately, they have not an adequate secure life. Famous athletes and entertainer are always the focus the media. People curios about not only their achievement but also their privet life, therefore I absolutely concur with the following statement with some main compelling reasons which I would explore on the followings paragraph.
First and foremost, privacy is one of the controversial issues in these days, being alone will provide the opportunity for athletes and entertainers to set the time to do affairs which they like to do. For example, they really would like to practice yoga as permanent activity in their life, since it affects their life in several aspects so imagine that they want to do some yoga by themselves, the huge amount of their fan come to them and ruin their composure. Therefore, these persons never have the chance to fell the happiness
The second factor which should be taken to the consideration is, the athletes and entertainer are most prominent role models for the children and their fans in additional children can easily be influenced by these persons so they always have to be kind toward their fans for example, one of my friend was great actor in my town and he had a traumatic experience in that time he broke up with his faience and I knew that he was very sad but he had to pretended his feeling and also he had to hid his felling. nevertheless, If he hadn’t been an actor, he wouldn’t have hidden his feeling.
The third important point to be mentioned is that it can be surmised that lack of privacy in actors and athlete’s lives has deleterious effects on their mental health. Statistical shows that the majority of popular person suffer from depression and it leads to suicide in some cases.
To make a long story short, contemplating all aforementioned reasons, I believe that every person in the world needs some privacy, so I encourage the people to change these devastating traits to let everybody have happier lives.
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- TOEFL T P O 40 - Integrated Writing Task 3
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 532, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...er have the chance to fell the happiness The second factor which should be taken ...
^^^
Line 3, column 509, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Nevertheless
...ing and also he had to hid his felling. nevertheless, If he hadn't been an actor, he wo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, nevertheless, really, second, so, therefore, third, for example, in addition, in some cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 51.0 43.0788530466 118% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 52.1666666667 88% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1757.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 357.0 407.700716846 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.92156862745 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34677393335 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76226837227 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.577030812325 0.524837075471 110% => OK
syllable_count: 564.3 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 20.6003584229 53% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 32.0 20.1344086022 159% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 139.44002532 48.9658058833 285% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 159.727272727 100.406767564 159% => OK
Words per sentence: 32.4545454545 20.6045352989 158% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.2727272727 5.45110844103 188% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.173687481126 0.236089414692 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0754198461344 0.076458572812 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0432987468658 0.0737576698707 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0945376816489 0.150856017488 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0675616686274 0.0645574589148 105% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.0 11.7677419355 153% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.0 58.1214874552 67% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.8 10.1575268817 156% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.85 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.07 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.8 10.0537634409 147% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.