Some parents offer their school age children money for each grade(mark) they get in school. Do you think is a good idea? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers

Essay topics:

Some parents offer their school age children money for each grade(mark) they get in school. Do you think is a good idea? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers

Money is an essential commodity to humans. It is not only used as a means for buying and selling, it can also be used to secure one’s future. In today’s world many parents offer their young one’s money for each of the high marks they were able to achieve in class while some parents are of the opinion that it isn’t necessary because they feel that’s what they ought to do and it’s not necessary to offer these young one’s monetary benefit. In my opinion I think young ones needs to be offered monetary benefits for two important reason which I will discuss in this essay.

First of all, monetary benefit serves as a source of motivation for this young ones to concentrate in school. Knowing they would be offered money for this high grade helps these young ones to focus on their studies in school. This in turn helps these young ones to pass their exams in flying colors. For example, in my basic two class my parent noticed that I don’t concentrate in class as was reported by my teachers. This affected my grades seriously because I’m always come with an average grades in class. My parent then resorts to giving me money for every high grades I was able to achieve. In no time I began to concentrate in class, and this impacted on my grade. Because after the exam I was among the top three in terms of grade that finished the second term of basic two. As my parent noticed the effect of this monetary benefit they promised me that they’ll continue to do that so long I keep turning out such grades. This motivated me throughout my high school days and it was reflected in my final WAEC exam. I had all distinctions in my paper. As you can see monetary benefits for young ones can help in motivating them to concentrate in class and in turn affect their grades positively.

Another reason is that monetary benefits can help a young child to imbibe a saving culture. Many young ones been paid these stipends by their parent for their good grades in school often quickly save this money and this helps them to inculcate the habit of saving, which in turn helps them when they reach adulthood. My own example demonstrates this to be a reality. During these years my mother pay me for doing well in school I often try as much to save most of these money. By the time I was done with my high school, I needed to get a laptop, with no time I was able to get it with the money I saved when I was in high school. This saving culture I was able to imbibe then also helped me when I started working because when I got my first job I wasn’t paid much. In spite of this, I was still able to save from the little I got from the job. This experience taught me that this money given to me by my parent for good grades achieved back then, helped to imbibe a good culture in me which later helped me in my adulthood.

In sum, though some parent may oppose this idea, giving money to young ones is a very positive act. Not only does it improve the concentration of these young ones, in turn making them do well in school, it also helps to imbibe a saving culture in them. Every parent should give this method a try so as to reap the benefits that comes from it.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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2018-08-09 damzy112 73 view
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 683, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...n class, and this impacted on my grade. Because after the exam I was among the top thre...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 465, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this money' or 'these moneys', 'these monies'?
Suggestion: this money; these moneys; these monies
...ool I often try as much to save most of these money. By the time I was done with my high sc...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 297, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...ry parent should give this method a try so as to reap the benefits that comes from it. ...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, may, second, so, still, then, well, while, as to, for example, i think, first of all, in my opinion, in spite of

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 108.0 43.0788530466 251% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 85.0 52.1666666667 163% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2618.0 1977.66487455 132% => OK
No of words: 596.0 407.700716846 146% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.39261744966 4.8611393121 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.94096258147 4.48103885553 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.32609646019 2.67179642975 87% => OK
Unique words: 243.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.407718120805 0.524837075471 78% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 828.9 618.680645161 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.94265232975 202% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.192127742 48.9658058833 119% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.962962963 100.406767564 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0740740741 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.62962962963 5.45110844103 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235086842219 0.236089414692 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0724644262315 0.076458572812 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.053441425837 0.0737576698707 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.15519937423 0.150856017488 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0274415558156 0.0645574589148 43% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 11.7677419355 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 58.1214874552 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.18 10.9000537634 75% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.32 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 86.8835125448 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.