Some parents offer their school - age children money for each high grade they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea.
Some parents thinks that by offering their children money as rewards , they will encourage them. They believe that money will promote children to do more. Although I understand their point of view, I have a different opinion. I believe that money will danger the children more than benefit them. The basis of my opinion is financial and educational.
From the financial perspective, money is the worst kind of rewards especially at young age. If parents offer their children with huge amount of money, they would danger them. For instance, children at young age do not understand the meaning or the value of the money. Some children just take the money and waste it on un important things. For example, buying unnecessary toys or candy or even lost the money. Others children want to try something new and if they have the money they will do that. For example, buying cigarette or alcohol. That for sure will danger their health and leads to serious problems. That is why I think that parents should encourage their children by giving them something else rather than money.
Educationally, the best reward parents can gives to children is to teach them the meaning of the money. To teach them how to save money. If parents want to reward their children, they will reward them by giving them points. Personally, I tried this method with my children. It is perfect. For example, every time my son pass in a test with high grade I give him some points. Then at the end of the month we transfer the points to money. For instance, if he earns 20 points during the month , I will give him 20 dollars to spend. But he has to tell me on what he will spend his money, and I have to agree or disagree. That way I teach my son the value of the money. Also I limit my son from spending money on unnecessary stuff.
In conclusion for the reasons I mentioned above, I do not encourage the parents to offer money to their children as rewards. Children do not understand the meaning of the money. Children need to learn what money mean before they spend it.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 14, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'think'.
Suggestion: think
Some parents thinks that by offering their children money...
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Line 1, column 20, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Some parents thinks that by offering their children money a...
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Line 1, column 26, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Some parents thinks that by offering their children money as rewa...
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Line 1, column 71, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...offering their children money as rewards , they will encourage them. They believe ...
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Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... opinion is financial and educational. From the financial perspective, money is...
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Line 4, column 70, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...tive, money is the worst kind of rewards especially at young age. If parents offe...
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Line 4, column 211, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...er them. For instance, children at young age do not understand the meaning or the...
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Line 4, column 456, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...thers children want to try something new and if they have the money they will do ...
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Line 4, column 545, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...or example, buying cigarette or alcohol. That for sure will danger their health a...
^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...hem something else rather than money. Educationally, the best reward parents c...
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Line 8, column 47, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[2]
Message: The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: 'give'
Suggestion: give
...cationally, the best reward parents can gives to children is to teach them the meanin...
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Line 8, column 493, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
..., if he earns 20 points during the month , I will give him 20 dollars to spend. Bu...
^^
Line 8, column 669, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... I teach my son the value of the money. Also I limit my son from spending money on u...
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Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... spending money on unnecessary stuff. In conclusion for the reasons I mentione...
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Line 12, column 182, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...not understand the meaning of the money. Children need to learn what money mean b...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, so, then, as to, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 15.1003584229 33% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 43.0 52.1666666667 82% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1738.0 1977.66487455 88% => OK
No of words: 378.0 407.700716846 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.59788359788 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40933352052 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41974220829 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 212.727598566 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.449735449735 0.524837075471 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 500.4 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 28.8839752054 48.9658058833 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 66.8461538462 100.406767564 67% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.5384615385 20.6045352989 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.46153846154 5.45110844103 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 15.0 5.5376344086 271% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.330567283097 0.236089414692 140% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.107866878196 0.076458572812 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0806593708083 0.0737576698707 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.246164609428 0.150856017488 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0565355905702 0.0645574589148 88% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 7.5 11.7677419355 64% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 82.65 58.1214874552 142% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 5.2 10.1575268817 51% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 8.81 10.9000537634 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.21 8.01818996416 77% => OK
difficult_words: 45.0 86.8835125448 52% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 5.5 10.002688172 55% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 6.0 10.247311828 59% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.