Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
It is undeniable that education is a popular topic, which can cause widespread public debate in different aspect because it affects people in their every day’s lives. Depending on personal experience, emotional concern and personality type people differ in their attitude toward this issue. Some people maintain the idea that for a better education parents should offer money for each high score to students. Others, on the other hand, take a radically a different point of view and hold the opinion that offering money is not a good method. In my view, I think offering money can be both positive and negative and in following lines, I will try to elaborate more on this perspective.
The main aspect to point out is that offering money for high scores can motivate students. When students receive gifts or money for their score they naturally want more and more of that gift so they try their best to get even higher score to receive again the money. When I was an English teacher, I had students with ages range from 7 to 12 years old. I used to give money to students with best score. After that, I could see how other students are studding hard to get best score for other exams to reach the money. So, it is apparent that offering money can motivate students to study more.
Furthermore, offering money can show them how important their education is. When parents give a valuable gift like money to students for their score, they imply students that their job is very significant. In this way, the students realize the value of education and it causes them to do better and better.
In contrast, it can make students conditional and money-oriented. Despite all positive consequences of giving money to students, it can cause students to just study for getting money and not for the value of education. In this way if parents do not offer money for a certain exam, students will be reluctant to study. It is obvious that giving money to students abundantly can be an ineffective tool for encouraging them
In sum, based on the arguments explored above, we can reach the conclusion that encouraging students by offering them money for high score can have both positive and negative results. In one hand, it can inspire students and show the significance of education to them. In the other hand, it may causes students to just study for money. Therefore, it is important to use this method of encouraging very cautiously.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 270, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... the significance of education to them. In the other hand, it may causes students ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, if, may, so, therefore, i think, in contrast, in my view, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 43.0788530466 111% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2024.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 420.0 407.700716846 103% => OK
Chars per words: 4.81904761905 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52701905584 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5833541803 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 192.0 212.727598566 90% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.457142857143 0.524837075471 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 639.9 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 3.0 0.994623655914 302% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.94265232975 202% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.8985579516 48.9658058833 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.380952381 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 20.6045352989 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.19047619048 5.45110844103 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.22605391165 0.236089414692 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0850569700727 0.076458572812 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0542090533443 0.0737576698707 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.147299119064 0.150856017488 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0305179161545 0.0645574589148 47% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 11.7677419355 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.68 10.9000537634 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.41 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Rates: 63.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.