Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Other believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork, which of the two approaches do you prefer?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, we are all facing hectic modern lives, and this leads our society to become more depressed than it was about fifty years ago. Personally, I believe that parents should spend their leisure time having fun with their kids, not on serious things such as helping with their homework or studying. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explain in the following essay.
To begin with, I think that if parents spend their free time entertaining their children, they can become closer to them. That is, while you play with your kids and laugh with them, they become more friendly with you than they were before, and will understand how much they mean to you. By making young people happy, or surprising them, or taking them to their favorite movies, we can learn them how important they are in our lives. For example, I remember when I a five-year-old girl, my dad took me to the park after work. He played so many games with me, such as hide and seek, chess, badminton, etc. I understood that he was tired in those days, and that meant a lot for me because I knew he loved me, so as I grew up, my relationship with him was always looked like two friends. Therefore, playing games in spare times can result in improving family relationships.
Secondly, playing sports and games can reduce the family's anxiety. When families play, they do not think of their workplace or school, or jobs they have to do because they have to concentrate on their games in order to win, so playing can make your mind free of the things that can make you anxious. In this case, there are some games and sports that not only can improve your mental health such as playing chess, solving puzzles, ping pong, but also they are fun and enjoyable, and kids will like them. For instance, in our house, we always had a ping pong table in our yard, and whenever our parents found enough time, they suggested us to go to the yard. Although it was a hard game to play, it was so entertaining that we never could resist playing it. While we were playing ping pong, all we were thinking about was how to become the winner of the game. As a result, adults and young people who play games have much healthier minds than the ones who do not.
To put it in a nutshell, I think families should devote their free time to something that develope their relationships with each other, and also something that results in having a much peaceful life, which is "having fun."
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2020-01-23 | nusybah | 73 | view |
2020-01-22 | farzaddanaei | 73 | view |
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2020-01-12 | mucahit11 | 60 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 465, Rule ID: I_A[1]
Message: Did you mean 'am' (first person of "to be")?
Suggestion: am
...r lives. For example, I remember when I a five-year-old girl, my dad took me to t...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, look, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, for example, for instance, i feel, i think, such as, as a result, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 84.0 43.0788530466 195% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 8.0752688172 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2014.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 446.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.51569506726 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.30785898071 2.67179642975 86% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.511210762332 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 594.0 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 9.59856630824 188% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 10.0 1.86738351254 536% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.8497241334 48.9658058833 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.888888889 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.7777777778 20.6045352989 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.77777777778 5.45110844103 143% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264973636178 0.236089414692 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0871710854329 0.076458572812 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.079929767334 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.169552251893 0.150856017488 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0233625348309 0.0645574589148 36% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 11.7677419355 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 72.5 58.1214874552 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.23 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.2 8.01818996416 90% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 86.8835125448 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.