TPO-31- Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Because the world is changing so quickly, people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the pastUse specific reasons and examples to

The rapid development of technology and culture is changing the society and people's lifestyle rapidly. However, whether the fast-paced modern world has bought us happiness and satisfaction has aroused heated arguments among people. People, nevertheless have different perspectives. Some people say the quickly changing society lacks important values such as composure and calmness, others argue that the modern society grants more contentment to people. In my point of view, I agree that the rapidly developing society has bought more satisfaction to people compared to the past. Due to the development of technology, life has became more convenient. Plus, the development of medical technology allows us to maintain our health.

To begin with, the overall quality of life has improved compared to the past. The creation of the internet enabled people to receive news promptly, search up information and communicate with other people around the glove. For example, imagine how life was before the development of internet and smartphones. People had to wait for newspapers every morning, search up numerous book to extract essential information and had to wait for months in order to contact a person in another countries through letters. Also, the means of entertainments have varied. For example, my grandparents once told me when they were young, all they could enjoy was just playing cards and reading books. Compared to this, in the modern society, people could enjoy various activities such as computer games and internet surfing. The development in VR technology and 3D cinemas virtualizes your craziest fantasies, allowing you to become whatever you want. Therefore, in means of convenience, modern world satisfies people's needs.

Also, development in the medical field enabled people to maintain a healthy life. In the past, many people had to suffer from various diseases caused by insanitary. Plus, getting appropriate medicine or care was almost impossible. For example, my great-grandfather had 11 siblings, but 4 of them died due to common cold and tetanus as they had no hospitals nor vaccine for them. However, nowadays the number of medical institutions increased and vaccines for most diseases are being developed and most people have access to those medical cares. In addition, the improvement of medical technology and appliances helps us overcome even fatal diseases such as cancer enhancing our life expectancy dramatically. Medical technology, in combine with computers is more accurate and able to detect even a minor change in our body. For example, my grandfather early detected his tumor present on his lungs using the CT camera technology and able to recover from cancer quickly. Thus, the changing world enhanced our health as well.

In conclusion, development of society brought satisfaction and happiness to people in terms of life quality and health.

Votes
Average: 8.5 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 628, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'become'.
Suggestion: become
...the development of technology, life has became more convenient. Plus, the development ...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, nevertheless, so, therefore, thus, well, for example, in addition, in conclusion, such as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 11.0286738351 27% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 43.0788530466 63% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 52.1666666667 123% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 8.0752688172 211% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2447.0 1977.66487455 124% => OK
No of words: 450.0 407.700716846 110% => OK
Chars per words: 5.43777777778 4.8611393121 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6057793516 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88898204978 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 243.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.54 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 756.0 618.680645161 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 8.0 3.08781362007 259% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.6349202726 48.9658058833 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.1153846154 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.3076923077 20.6045352989 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.92307692308 5.45110844103 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.140099243799 0.236089414692 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.042208259611 0.076458572812 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0383374716751 0.0737576698707 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0904179034851 0.150856017488 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0209249243647 0.0645574589148 32% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 11.7677419355 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.76 58.1214874552 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.98 10.9000537634 128% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.55 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 86.8835125448 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.