As scholars paying attention to people's impact on enhancing or decreasing the level of the success that our society achieves, we are all eager to know that which path is the most one in making our society a prosperous and educated one. Although many sociologists argue as if it is a general truth that juvenile do not have a determining role in the future success of their society, I strongly contend that they can revolutionize a society by themselves. Among countless reasons which can firmly vindicate my point of view, I will pinpoint the two most conspicuous ones through following paragraphs.
The first thing that juts out of mind easily at the first moment of thinking about this issue is the fact that with the advent of technology, students became more intelligent compared to the past. In other words, technology- especially computer- provided people to activate their minds more frequently and efficiently. It goes without saying that, high school students can contemplate an elaborate problem in mathematics or physics in a short amount of time because they have a lot of work which deals with the computer in their daily lives. An example can illuminate this claim to some extent. Microsoft Company acknowledged the news which revealed that it hired two hundred and fifty young employees and fired five hundred middle age ones and reached its maximum efficiency. This indicates that young people not only have the ability to work more efficiently, but also can depict their ability the most in computer related issues because they are more intelligent in comparison with their fathers or even elder brothers.
The second thing that is worth considering is the fact that young people are more aware of and obsessed with their influential role as significant parts of their society. Needless to say, as people are more educated and work as key stones of some companies or offices, they have understood that by gaining knowledge and experienced they can endow their societies with several breakthroughs. The noteworthy refreshingly intelligible statistics which was revealed by a research conducted in universities of Australia, after Steve Jobs- the founder of Apple Incorporation- death, the students' tendency toward technology-related science increased exponentially because they understood the value of being an influential person in their society more. This indicates that young people's fixation on coming up with something new will encourage them in order to achieve their goal.
To make a long story short, base on the aforementioned arguments, there are many persuasive reasons which can lead people in order to agree on the idea that juvenile can have a determining role in their society such as their increased intelligence and diligence and their understanding of their roles for making their society a prosperous one. But that was just a shot out of a canon. Obviously, there are many other reasons and examples, challenging the claim, which are not mentioned here. All in all, it is a really potential anticipation that this trend will continue and people will come up with more and more sophisticated contributions for their societies.
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- TPO-32 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Young people today have no influence on the important decisions that determine the future of society as a whole.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answe 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 312, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... if it is a general truth that juvenile dont have a determining role in the future s...
^^^^
Line 3, column 581, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...nder of Apple Incorporation- death, the students tendency toward technology related scie...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 771, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'peoples'' or 'people's'?
Suggestion: peoples'; people's
...society more. This indicates that young peoples fixation on coming up with something ne...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, really, second, so, such as, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 11.0286738351 209% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2650.0 1977.66487455 134% => OK
No of words: 510.0 407.700716846 125% => OK
Chars per words: 5.19607843137 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75217629947 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87293111291 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 265.0 212.727598566 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.519607843137 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 832.5 618.680645161 135% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 30.0 20.1344086022 149% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 83.0301566927 48.9658058833 170% => OK
Chars per sentence: 155.882352941 100.406767564 155% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.0 20.6045352989 146% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.82352941176 5.45110844103 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.122233486646 0.236089414692 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0442061555968 0.076458572812 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0250669126591 0.0737576698707 34% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0853228055561 0.150856017488 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0104715937938 0.0645574589148 16% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.1 11.7677419355 154% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.03 58.1214874552 71% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.1575268817 148% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 10.9000537634 124% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.03 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 86.8835125448 145% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 10.002688172 185% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 10.0537634409 139% => OK
text_standard: 19.0 10.247311828 185% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.