Children are considered one of the most important aspects in parent's life. Nowadays, parents are living at very dynamic world and the life is so fast. Many parents are so busy all week long doing a lot of activities to support their children. I am sure that some people would agree parents should spend time with their children doing tasks related to schoolwork instead of practicing sports would be a great idea, while other would disagree. However, when it comes to me I totally agree that parents should spend their free time with their chidren palying different kinds of excersie. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, practicing sports helps students to relieve stress. Recently, many students are struggling with many assignments and exams and sports can help them feel energized. For instance, my brother is a student at medical school and he spends a lot of days at camp with other colleagues. Furthermore, he is staying away from his family for a long time. In addition,he has a lot of paper work to do every month and he has to work on his graduation project. So, he always feels stressed and he never gets in touch with his parents on regular basies. So, he could not get high scores in the first semester. On the other hand, my daughter is fifth grade and she always goes to swimming pool with my husband two times per week. Furthermore, she can feel happy and she can get rid from any frustration. Consequently, she would able to focus during the classes. In addition, she graduated with ownership. As you can see, practice exercise with children helps them to get ride from any stress.
In addition, sports can help students avoid obesity, which is considred the main cause of chronic diseases. Recently, children eat unhealthy food and they do not have time to practice activitues. For example. My cousin is living at different company and he is living in the dorm with his friend. in addition, he always eats fast food with high fatty substances. In fact, last summer, he gained too much weight and he started to suffer from high blood pressure. In fact, he decided to go back home to saty with his parents. Furthermore, his father decided to spend a lot of time with him at gym to practice tremendous sports. Consequently, he would able to lose ten bounds at the first week. As a result, his blood pressure backed to the normal level. Nevertheless, if he completed the whole year at the camps, he could not improve his medical status. This experience taught me that children should spend time with their parents to practice sports.
In sum, I totally believe that parents should spend their free time with their children having fun and practice sports. This is because sports help students to relive stress, and because playing different kind of games prevent obesity. So, children can enjoy healthy life far way from any chronic diseases like diabetes or hypertension
- TPO-45 Integrated Writing Task 3
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 362, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ildren doing tasks related to schoolwork instead of practicing sports would be a ...
^^
Line 3, column 371, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , he
... his family for a long time. In addition,he has a lot of paper work to do every mon...
^^^
Line 5, column 297, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
... is living in the dorm with his friend. in addition, he always eats fast food with...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, furthermore, however, if, nevertheless, so, while, as to, for example, for instance, i feel, in addition, in fact, kind of, as a result, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 73.0 52.1666666667 140% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2440.0 1977.66487455 123% => OK
No of words: 511.0 407.700716846 125% => OK
Chars per words: 4.77495107632 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75450408675 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49752770092 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 253.0 212.727598566 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.495107632094 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 717.3 618.680645161 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 22.0 9.59856630824 229% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.6003584229 155% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.3469483703 48.9658058833 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.25 100.406767564 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.96875 20.6045352989 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.9375 5.45110844103 109% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.248871042808 0.236089414692 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0652446533735 0.076458572812 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0862595716378 0.0737576698707 117% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.182051943698 0.150856017488 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0633819036321 0.0645574589148 98% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.0 11.7677419355 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 73.17 58.1214874552 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.8 10.1575268817 67% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.09 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.1 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 86.8835125448 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 10.247311828 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.