YOUNG ADULTS SHOULD WORK PART TIME
Some people think that if children work part time that will have a negative effect on them. They think that children should focus more on their study. Although I understand their point of view I have a different opinion. I believe that children should work at least in the summer time. The basis of my opinion is social and financial
Working part time will help students to increase their social net work. The social life of student in schools are limited to their parents and their friends. If students are allowed to work part time in the summer, that will benefit them to be more sociable. For example, what children doing in school is just studying for their home work, taking to their friend, or working on some projects or researches assigned to them by their teacher. They have a very limit social life. Working part time will provides them the opportunity to communicate with different kids of people. They will be able to understand people easily, and that will help them in their future after graduation from college. Although children may think that working part time is not their preferable thing, but they will like that after a couple of weeks as they found that they became more sociable and more confident dealing with other people. That is why I think that working part time is important for children at young age to help them communicate easily in the future.
It is very important to remember that working part time for children has a good financial benefit. Some children at younger age do not know the meaning of the money. Most of them want to spend money on less important stuff , such as toys, video games ,or even useless clothes. If the children are encouraged to work part time, that will allow them to understand the true meaning of the money. For instance, when they work they work hard to get payment. This will be a good point to encourage them to work. If a student work in a shop for about 6 hours per day, he is standing and cleaning and do all the work in the shop, then he get his money, this students know that money is important and that getting money is not easy. So he will save the money for the most precious thing he needs and he will never spend money on something useless again. That is how children learn the meaning of the money and how they can spend money, just by working part time.
In conclusion, for the reasons I mentioned above, I encouraged all the parents to persuade their children to work part time. Working for children is a kind of success. Children will learn how to communicate freely with other strangers, and they become more social and active. Children will gain the knowledge of becoming more mature and save their money, they will only spend the money on the important things.
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| 2022-11-19 | rpinisetti8 | 73 | view |
| 2022-11-15 | KnockingOn | 73 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Some people think that if children work ...
^^^
Line 2, column 41, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...Some people think that if children work part time that will have a negative effect on the...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 152, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Although” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ldren should focus more on their study. Although I understand their point of view I have...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 274, Rule ID: SUMMER_TIME[2]
Message: Use simply 'summer'.
Suggestion: summer
...at children should work at least in the summer time. The basis of my opinion is social and ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 334, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...is of my opinion is social and financial Working part time will help students to ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 9, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...social and financial Working part time will help students to increase their so...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 72, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...dents to increase their social net work. The social life of student in schools ar...
^^
Line 6, column 192, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...riends. If students are allowed to work part time in the summer, that will benefit them t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 320, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hildren doing in school is just studying for their home work, taking to their fri...
^^
Line 6, column 408, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r working on some projects or researches assigned to them by their teacher. They ...
^^
Line 6, column 489, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... have a very limit social life. Working part time will provides them the opportunity to ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 504, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'provide'
Suggestion: provide
...mit social life. Working part time will provides them the opportunity to communicate wi...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 533, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... time will provides them the opportunity to communicate with different kids of pe...
^^
Line 6, column 739, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...Although children may think that working part time is not their preferable thing,...
^^
Line 6, column 741, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...though children may think that working part time is not their preferable thing, but they...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 954, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...eople. That is why I think that working part time is important for children at young age ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hem communicate easily in the future. It is very important to remember that wo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 47, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...very important to remember that working part time for children has a good financial benef...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 223, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...t to spend money on less important stuff , such as toys, video games ,or even usel...
^^
Line 11, column 251, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ortant stuff , such as toys, video games ,or even useless clothes. If the children...
^^
Line 11, column 317, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... If the children are encouraged to work part time, that will allow them to understand the...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 413, Rule ID: PHRASE_REPETITION[1]
Message: This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only 'they work'.
Suggestion: they work
...eaning of the money. For instance, when they work they work hard to get payment. This will be a goo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 479, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...o get payment. This will be a good point to encourage them to work. If a student ...
^^
Line 11, column 632, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'gets'.
Suggestion: gets
...nd do all the work in the shop, then he get his money, this students know that mon...
^^^
Line 11, column 647, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ork in the shop, then he get his money, this students know that money is important ...
^^^^
Line 11, column 660, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...op, then he get his money, this students know that money is important and that ge...
^^
Line 11, column 752, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...y is not easy. So he will save the money for the most precious thing he needs and...
^^
Line 11, column 947, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...w they can spend money, just by working part time. In conclusion, for the reas...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 12, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...end money, just by working part time. In conclusion, for the reasons I mention...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 115, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...ents to persuade their children to work part time. Working for children is a kind of succ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 411, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...spend the money on the important things.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, may, so, then, as to, at least, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, kind of, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 64.0 43.0788530466 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2320.0 1977.66487455 117% => OK
No of words: 503.0 407.700716846 123% => OK
Chars per words: 4.61232604374 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73578520332 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.32269670965 2.67179642975 87% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.405566600398 0.524837075471 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 672.3 618.680645161 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.5741533455 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.8 100.406767564 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.12 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.32 5.45110844103 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 31.0 5.5376344086 560% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.281122386248 0.236089414692 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.113736543179 0.076458572812 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0967963998435 0.0737576698707 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.19456983379 0.150856017488 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0584279032284 0.0645574589148 91% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 11.7677419355 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 76.56 58.1214874552 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.46 10.9000537634 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.01 8.01818996416 87% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.