Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.
With the rapid development of social media we have an opportunity to read news about our beloved stars; however, sometimes these news display their personal life. Personally, I believe that society should give more personal space to celebrities. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in following essay.
First of all, it is not the duty of famous people to display their whole life to the audience. Everything we see on TV is their work, not the life. Music performances, concerts, TV programs, competitions these are their duties at work like a paper work for office worker. Superstars are ordinary people; they have families, friends, pets, hobbies and etc. and like all of us want to have some rest after a difficult work day. I can imagine how annoying and uncomfortable it is when you just want to hang out with your friends or just eat out, but wherever you go inescapable paparazzi follows. We should be more emphatic and then we will understand and respect personal space of celebrities.
Secondly, high attention to private life may negatively affect famous people. Journalists always seek for something intriguing, so they may bring up not appropriate past events. Performers have different kinds of fans, so even if it was deep in the past and now everything is different probably some part of audience may show negative attitude. This will cause stress which may bring to the end of career or even to the suicide. For instance, Korean performers are highly influenced by public opinion. Last year member of Korean music group committed a suicide because of the pressure and negative attitude of audience to his past deeds. It was unexpected for everyone because the group was successful and beloved by fans.
In conclusion I am of the opinion that celebrities deserve to live more private lives. This is because all the superstars are do not differ from us, they just complete their work every other day, also invasion to their private life might lead to deplorable consequences.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 124, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this news' or 'these newses'?
Suggestion: this news; these newses
...t our beloved stars; however, sometimes these news display their personal life. Personally...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 348, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
...y have families, friends, pets, hobbies and etc. and like all of us want to have some re...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 127, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'done'.
Suggestion: done
... This is because all the superstars are do not differ from us, they just complete ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 10.4613686534 124% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 5.04856512141 218% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 11.0 7.30242825607 151% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 12.0772626932 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 36.0 22.412803532 161% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 45.0 30.3222958057 148% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 5.01324503311 120% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1679.0 1373.03311258 122% => OK
No of words: 339.0 270.72406181 125% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95280235988 5.08290768461 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29091512845 4.04702891845 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70566286713 2.5805825403 105% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 145.348785872 140% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.598820058997 0.540411800872 111% => OK
syllable_count: 531.0 419.366225166 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 3.25607064018 307% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 0.0 8.23620309051 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 13.0662251656 145% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 21.2450331126 80% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.1414483614 49.2860985944 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.3684210526 110.228320801 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8421052632 21.698381199 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.94736842105 7.06452816374 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 4.19205298013 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 4.33554083885 138% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.27373068433 211% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146954794031 0.272083759551 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0395375863583 0.0996497079465 40% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0344728328382 0.0662205650399 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0841713634781 0.162205337803 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0223205756481 0.0443174109184 50% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 13.3589403974 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 53.8541721854 101% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.0289183223 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.13 12.2367328918 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.42419426049 96% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 63.6247240618 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.7273730684 79% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.498013245 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Rates: 81.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.