In some countries, teenagers have jobs while they are still students. Do you think this is a good idea? Support your opinion by using specific reasons and details.
The idea of a teenager works while studying does not sound unreasonable. However, some people think that young people should not work while attending classes. Since students need money to pay the universities' fees, supporters may say teenagers must be allowed to get hired by companies. Nevertheless, in my view, this is not a good idea for some reasons.
To begin with, the concept of generating money without having a career may discourage individuals to keep studying. When kids learn that they do not need to acquire new knowledge in order to obtain large amounts of money, they do not feel motivated to go to universities. Therefore, parents should not let their children work until they have already finished the entire career. For example, my cousin Antony finished high school sooner than the other kids. As a result, he started working with my uncle in his private school. Because Antony discovered he did not have to attend classes to produce money, he decided to stop studying. Unfortunately, he did not have the opportunity to go to the university to acquire new knowledge, so he missed several important experiences that are only learned in these institutions.
Another reason to be against of working during college is that this takes away many hours of teenager's time, so they get distracted easily. College studies require many hours of classes since students must perform a lot of tests and assignments. Thus, a student with a job won't have as much time available as a full-time student. This will eventually let a drop in the person's grade because he could not afford to perform both activities perfectly. With this in mind, my friend John got hired by a restaurant while we were in the first years of the university. Since he worked after school, John did not have time to finish the tasks the professor sent it or even prepare for the upcoming exams. Consequently, John who was an outstanding student finished his final score with a mediocre grade. It was not that he did not want to study, but he was out of time to perform the assignments. Hence, the ridiculous idea that supports students having jobs is unsupported since only a super student will be able to afford such stressful conditions.
To sum up, students should spend their time studying instead of working. For all my reasons above, there is not way that a student can do both activities perfectly. Moreover, later in life, they will work as much as they want, so why to hurry up and push this process? I do not have a kid yet, but he will not work until he has already finished his education.
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flaws:
The essay is not exactly right on the topic.
Teenager means a person aged from 13 to 19 years. So they are not ready for university or college yet.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? in 30
Category: ? Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 448 350
No. of Characters: 2083 1500
No. of Different Words: 231 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.601 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.65 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.551 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 135 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.93 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.274 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.442 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.116 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5