TPO 10 - Independent task
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In today's world there are so many distractions that one can easily get lost. This is the reason why parents should always control their childs, not allowing them to waste their precious time in playing computer games. In this essay, I will focus on why childrens should not be allowed to play them, by giving examples and specific explanations for that.
To start with, childrens who play computer games or similar stuff may develop bad habits. For instance, they may start to acquire an unhealthy lifestyle, spending many hours per day sit on the couch. They may also start postponing a bit and then always more, forgetting other important duties like homeworks. Having said that, I believe that parents must forbid them playing videogames, as bad habits are very difficult to eradicate.
Moreover, they should learn that time management is very important and they have to spend their free time in the best way they can. They should take advantage of their leisure time, practising sports, doing launguage courses and other cultural or recreative activities that will come in handy, potentially helping them in the future and this is not the case of computer games.
As parent, I am firmly convinced that they should not spend their valuable time in lazy and unuseful activities. Most of the kids playing computer games tend to become dependent from those kind of activities and it is widely accepted that developing addictions especially at a young age could have a bad influence on their growing up. Becoming addict to something will distort their sense of reality and even their lives. For example, playing computer games could distract kids from focusing on their studies.
To wrap up, I agree with the idea of banning videogames, given that: on one hand, will help kids to grow up healthier; on the other, it will also give them the chance to reach maturity, becoming aware of the way they should manage their own time.
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Sentence: In this essay, I will focus on why childrens should not be allowed to play them, by giving examples and specific explanations for that.
Error: childrens Suggestion: children
Sentence: To start with, childrens who play computer games or similar stuff may develop bad habits.
Error: childrens Suggestion: children
Sentence: They should take advantage of their leisure time, practising sports, doing launguage courses and other cultural or recreative activities that will come in handy, potentially helping them in the future and this is not the case of computer games.
Error: launguage Suggestion: language
Error: practising Suggestion: practicing
Sentence: As parent, I am firmly convinced that they should not spend their valuable time in lazy and unuseful activities.
Error: unuseful Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: To wrap up, I agree with the idea of banning videogames, given that: on one hand, will help kids to grow up healthier; on the other, it will also give them the chance to reach maturity, becoming aware of the way they should manage their own time.
Error: videogames Suggestion: ?
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
Double check spelling errors.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 326 350
No. of Characters: 1561 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.249 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.788 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.373 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 101 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 75 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 53 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.286 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.215 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.61 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.137 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5