"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, the proposed new jazz club in Monroe, the C-Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popular in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's annual jazz festival last summer; several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe; and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight at 7 P.M. Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment."
The developers of the C-Note claims that the jazz music club in Monroe will be a highly profitable enterprise on the basis of the local market, the popularity of Monroe’s annual jazz festival, and the rating of a radio program – ‘Jazz Nightly.' However, the basis of the argument does not provide sound reasoning behind the profitability of the enterprise.
Firstly, the author claims that the jazz club will have the local market all to itself as the nearest jazz club is considerably far from the city. This claim is based on the assumption that the people of Monroe are fond of jazz music and will provide the high number of visitors in the club. The author also forgets to consider the possibility of the opening of the new clubs that may share the market in the future.
Moreover, the author falsely correlates the popularity of Monroe’s annual jazz festival with the popularity of music in general population of Monroe. To support this claim, the author provides the number of attendants of Monroe’s annual jazz festival last summer. However, this data does not suggest that the jazz music is popular with the local population as it is also possible that the majority of the people of the festival was tourists and the count of local visitors was very small. Also, the data provides the information only about one year and fails to indicate the long term trend.
The author also states that the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is ‘Jazz Nightly.' But, the high rating does not suggest a significant number of listeners as it is possible that only a few number of people with the penchant of jazz music are the listeners of the show. Even if there are high numbers of listeners of the radio show, we can’t assume that the people will like to visit jazz club if there is one nearby.
Also, the author states the national study indicating that a typical jazz fan spends a large amount on jazz entertainment. But, the nationwide survey can’t show the trends of the local populace. It may be possible that the people of Monroe does not prefer to spend money on the entertainment.
Thus, the author needs to study more about the local market and provide the evidence that indicates the local trends of the people of Monroe to conclude that the jazz music club in Monroe would be a highly profitable business.
- "A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, the proposed new jazz club in Monroe, the C-Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popul 50
- We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been inbusiness at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer basebecause it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening thec 50
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d the profitability of the enterprise. Firstly, the author claims that the jazz...
^^^
Line 7, column 196, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun number seems to be countable; consider using: 'few numbers'.
Suggestion: few numbers
...listeners as it is possible that only a few number of people with the penchant of jazz mus...
^^^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'firstly', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'moreover', 'so', 'thus', 'as to', 'in general']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.29347826087 0.25644967241 114% => OK
Verbs: 0.115217391304 0.15541462614 74% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0695652173913 0.0836205057962 83% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0521739130435 0.0520304965353 100% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0130434782609 0.0272364105082 48% => OK
Prepositions: 0.134782608696 0.125424944231 107% => OK
Participles: 0.00652173913043 0.0416121511921 16% => Some participles wanted.
Conjunctions: 2.58950315631 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0173913043478 0.026700313972 65% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.15652173913 0.113004496875 139% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0195652173913 0.0255425247493 77% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00434782608696 0.0127820249294 34% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2360.0 2731.13054187 86% => OK
No of words: 405.0 446.07635468 91% => OK
Chars per words: 5.82716049383 6.12365571057 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48604634366 4.57801047555 98% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.330864197531 0.378187486979 87% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.207407407407 0.287650121315 72% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.155555555556 0.208842608468 74% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0962962962963 0.135150697306 71% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58950315631 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 207.018472906 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.387654320988 0.469332199767 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 40.9669422372 52.1807786196 79% => OK
How many sentences: 16.0 20.039408867 80% => OK
Sentence length: 25.3125 23.2022227129 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.7493842327 57.7814097925 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 147.5 141.986410481 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.3125 23.2022227129 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.75 0.724660767414 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.14285714286 117% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 3.58251231527 56% => OK
Readability: 46.0532407407 51.9672348444 89% => OK
Elegance: 2.40963855422 1.8405768891 131% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.509068668016 0.441005458295 115% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.195505927622 0.135418324435 144% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0921893397193 0.0829849096947 111% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.748442558951 0.58762219726 127% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.124798817792 0.147661913831 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.295635480501 0.193483328276 153% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.108552823074 0.0970749176394 112% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.628591968808 0.42659136922 147% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0826602502635 0.0774707102158 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.405247614828 0.312017818177 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0728999654429 0.0698173142475 104% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.33743842365 120% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.87684729064 44% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.82512315271 62% => OK
Positive topic words: 10.0 6.46551724138 155% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.82389162562 106% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 14.657635468 109% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.