The following appeared in a memo from the director of International student affairs at Darrington College.
"To better serve the international students being admitted to Darrington College, we should build a new cafeteria catering to the students at subsidized rates. The current cafeteria is vary old and serves only expensive items and dishes, a point that will surely deter future international students from applying to Darrington College. Building a new cafeteria will prevent this from happening and will certainly lead to a dramatic increase in the popularity of Darrington College. Moreover, a new cafeteria will help Darrington College to justify an increased budget for educational iprovement this year. Building a new cafeteria will therefore be a great step towards enhancing the ranking of Darrington College."
The director of International student affairs at Darrington College states that the new cafeteria would attract the new International students due to subsidized rates, and finally increase the number of students who would like to take admission to the Darrington college. Obviously, the argument provided is flawed which can be explained in following paragraphs.
First, the author states that to better the international students being admitted to Darrington college, they should build a new cafeteria catering to students at subsidized rates. The author also states that the current cafeteria is very old and serves only expensive items and dishes, a point that will surely deter future international students from applying to Darrington college. To explain the fact that the old cafeteria is serving only expensive items and dishes, the author have not given any specific evidence. It might be like comparing the menu price with the price with the nearby restaurants. It may be possible that the international students who get admitted in the college are very rich and they do not eat food at the old cafeteria. Or it may be possibility that the students who are admitted in the college do not like the food in the old college cafeteria, and therefore go outside campus cafeteria.
Second, the author also states that the building a new cafeteria will certainly lead to a dramatic increase in the popularity of Darrington College. Popularity of any college is not depends upon the quality of the food is provided there, but it depends upon the quality of the teaching staff and their experience in teaching. And, also the placement records of the college. But, the author states that this cafeteria will surely increase the popularity of the Darrington College.
Third, the author further states that the new cafeteria will help Darrington college to justify an increased budget for educational improvement this year. Also, the new cafeteria will therefore be a great step towards enhance the ranking of Darrington college. the author again failed to describe the how can he able to justify the budget for educational improvement.
As the above clearly states that the building the new cafeteria with subsidized rates will affect the Darrington college's popularity and the increase in rate of admission of the international students.
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2018-11-05 | sakshee | 49 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 262, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...ance the ranking of Darrington college. the author again failed to describe the how...
^^^
Line 7, column 298, Rule ID: THE_HOW[1]
Message: Did you mean 'how'?
Suggestion: how
...ge. the author again failed to describe the how can he able to justify the budget for e...
^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'finally', 'first', 'if', 'may', 'second', 'so', 'therefore', 'third']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.269135802469 0.25644967241 105% => OK
Verbs: 0.135802469136 0.15541462614 87% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0913580246914 0.0836205057962 109% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0543209876543 0.0520304965353 104% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0197530864198 0.0272364105082 73% => OK
Prepositions: 0.106172839506 0.125424944231 85% => OK
Participles: 0.0296296296296 0.0416121511921 71% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.82147510413 2.79052419416 101% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0296296296296 0.026700313972 111% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.143209876543 0.113004496875 127% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0345679012346 0.0255425247493 135% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0148148148148 0.0127820249294 116% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2348.0 2731.13054187 86% => OK
No of words: 376.0 446.07635468 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.24468085106 6.12365571057 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40348946061 4.57801047555 96% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.412234042553 0.378187486979 109% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.324468085106 0.287650121315 113% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.247340425532 0.208842608468 118% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.154255319149 0.135150697306 114% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82147510413 2.79052419416 101% => OK
Unique words: 155.0 207.018472906 75% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.412234042553 0.469332199767 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 42.5726516845 52.1807786196 82% => OK
How many sentences: 16.0 20.039408867 80% => OK
Sentence length: 23.5 23.2022227129 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.024842376 57.7814097925 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 146.75 141.986410481 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.5 23.2022227129 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.625 0.724660767414 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 3.58251231527 56% => OK
Readability: 55.9468085106 51.9672348444 108% => OK
Elegance: 1.92941176471 1.8405768891 105% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.617945256304 0.441005458295 140% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.197523897741 0.135418324435 146% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.147498710148 0.0829849096947 178% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.703061398203 0.58762219726 120% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.145038543034 0.147661913831 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.321706009472 0.193483328276 166% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.133476200028 0.0970749176394 137% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.523586930323 0.42659136922 123% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0484594260855 0.0774707102158 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.461188309404 0.312017818177 148% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0875362844486 0.0698173142475 125% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.33743842365 132% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.87684729064 44% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.82512315271 41% => OK
Positive topic words: 11.0 6.46551724138 170% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 2.82389162562 71% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 14.657635468 109% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.