The number of overweight children in developed countries is increasing.
Some people think this is due to problems such as the growing number of fast food outlets. Others believe that parents are to blame for not looking after their children’s health.
During the last few years, there has been an increase in number of children who lost their diet control and get trouble with obesity. There are some causes why it has become quite popular issue among of teenagers especially who live in developing countries. They just could not afford do sport activities and as all of people affect by advertising and promoting fast food industry. Moreover, not all of parent care about diet of their children.
Firstly, it is well-know that kids in developing countries usually do leisure activities because their parents could not provide them opportunity to do sports or achieve some goals that require necessary amount of money. In that case, children usually choose spent much time by relaxing and watching TV at home. This aspects of live influence on kids in bad way because they could not have fun by playing or doing work out exercise most of the time.
Secondly, parents could not check and follow their children all the time so youth may be effect by advertising or some harmful friend’s habits as well. To begin with childhood of their kids, parents used to take them to fast food restaurant so as that kind of food have quite remarkable taste and low prices.
Thirdly, children should blame that they do not put much attention to health issues in order to avoid bad aftermath. They prefer to attend such places that do not require much money and energy in order to not to be overtired or stressed.
To conclusion, obesity is cause by some reasons such as parents’ indifference to children diet, accessible money or a large amount of advertisement of fast food restaurants. All of these things affected on children and they are usually inclined to leisure activities that tend to be the beginning of the obesity diseases.
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Sentence: There are some causes why it has become quite popular issue among of teenagers especially who live in developing countries.
Suggestion: There are some causes why it has become a quite popular issue among teenagers especially who live in developing countries.
Sentence: This aspects of live influence on kids in bad way because they could not have fun by playing or doing work out exercise most of the time.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to This and aspects
Sentence: They prefer to attend such places that do not require much money and energy in order to not to be overtired or stressed.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a negator
Suggestion: Refer to to and not
flaws:
Still have grammatical issues.
Read a good gram book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 303 350
No. of Characters: 1438 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.172 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.746 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.457 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 98 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 74 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 47 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.308 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.662 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.462 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.351 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.642 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5