Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Word Count: 344
Famous entertainers play a vital role in our lives and well-being. They progress our success in an endless way because they encompass our core. Therefore, I adamantly agree that famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now because of the invention of sophisticated technology made their life much popular.
First of all, flourishing technology has a profound impact on the actor's being. Indeed, it exposed their lives to the rest of the people by utilizing this technology which showed all their daily activities. For instance, one of the famous characters died last mount; she was working as a manager in the beauty center. Much different rumor presented by people regarding the causes of her death, some of them said that she was an addict, other said that she killed by someone, and many different stories began to appear in the social media which negatively affected the character's family. These harmful stories hurt her family emotionally. Moreover, these hearsays have a crucial implication on the character reputation, in fact, she passed away, so she does not need these harmful stories. Hence, I believe that the people should reassess their priority and make the life of known person private.
Second, technical development has a dramatic influence on the entertainer's safety. Indeed, the invention of the technology exhibits every specific detail regarding the known individual. For example, Nowadays, it becomes impossible to keep your life private, using many applications such as snap chat, Facebook, and others which shoe to us all the activity during the day made their life unsafe. Everyone can easily to violate and intrude the lives of these characters which put them and their relative under risk. Besides, technical innovation endanger their lives significantly by showing their achievement in the social media which destroy their privacy considerably. Therefore, famous individuals need more secure life today.
For the reasons mentioned above, from my perspective, famous entertainers need more private life than today. Hopefully, all people be aware of the importance of this privacy to ensure a secure life for them.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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| 2019-12-31 | Abbas.ghaffari | 70 | view |
| 2019-10-21 | M.S 2019 | 73 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
because of the invention of sophisticated technology made their life much popular.
because the invention of sophisticated technology made their life much popular.
all people be aware of the importance of this privacy to ensure a secure life for them.
all people will be aware of the importance of this privacy to ensure a secure life for them.
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flaws:
two reasons are relatively similar.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 344 350
No. of Characters: 1791 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.307 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.206 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.68 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 134 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 98 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.386 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.48 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.163 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 94, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an endless way" with adverb for "endless"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...d well-being. They progress our success in an endless way because they encompass our core. Theref...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 480, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...er said that she killed by someone, and many different stories began to appear in the social m...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 569, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'characters'' or 'character's'?
Suggestion: characters'; character's
...ial media which negatively affected the characters family. These harmful stories hurt her ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, hence, if, moreover, regarding, second, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, in fact, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 15.1003584229 33% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 43.0788530466 97% => OK
Preposition: 38.0 52.1666666667 73% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1843.0 1977.66487455 93% => OK
No of words: 344.0 407.700716846 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.35755813953 4.8611393121 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.30665032142 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75827673048 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 194.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.563953488372 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 587.7 618.680645161 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.6329738355 48.9658058833 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.388888889 100.406767564 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1111111111 20.6045352989 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.44444444444 5.45110844103 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.154607445964 0.236089414692 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0490889439575 0.076458572812 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0796610487876 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.115461038167 0.150856017488 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.09304315533 0.0645574589148 144% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 11.7677419355 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 58.1214874552 75% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.81 10.9000537634 127% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.17 8.01818996416 114% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 86.8835125448 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.