"The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company. "According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising."
The advirtising direction of super screen movie production presents his speculation about the low number of viewers of its production despite of having positive reviews from reviewers for specific movies. This position is based on an assumption, there is a lacking of advirtising and promotion of the movies. I am taking exception for several reosons.
The direction here talked about the increasing percentage of positive reviews from movie reviewers for certain movies. But does not mentioned the percentage rate and how much the positive review rate has increased. Without the clarification of the increasing percentage, the director can not explain the situation clearly that supports his conclusion.
Again, despite of having increased percentage of positive reviews, these are for a specific movies. That means, the target audiences of these movies are of the specific kinds, like of specific genre, not general. So, it explains well why fewer people attended the movies than any other years. If the movie is produced for a specific targeted audience, then more advirtising of that particular kind of movies cannot increase the general viewers.
Furthermore, the marketing department present the report of only the past year, but there is no report or survey which presents the scenerion of several years. There is a possibility that in other years, the quality and content of the production were quite satisfiable. Or there is also anothe probable scenerio that the content of the production of that company is not up to the mark for general viewers. Acknowledging that, most of the general people did not want to attend the movies of that company. So ignoring the content and quality of the movies will not helpful at all. The marketing department should also make a survey about the reaction of the attended viewers about the quality in general, not for the specific movies and also what the general viewers expectected content.
In conclusion, only allocating great share of budget to the advirtisement cannot help to reach to the prospective viewers. To achieve this goal, the company should also consider more probable scenarios mentioned above apart from the current assumption.
- Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish. 33
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- "The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company. "According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in a 43
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The advirtising direction of super screen movie production presents his speculation about the low number of viewers of its production despite of having positive reviews from reviewers for specific movies.
Error: advirtising Suggestion: advertising
Sentence: This position is based on an assumption, there is a lacking of advirtising and promotion of the movies.
Error: advirtising Suggestion: advertising
Sentence: I am taking exception for several reosons.
Error: reosons Suggestion: reasons
Sentence: If the movie is produced for a specific targeted audience, then more advirtising of that particular kind of movies cannot increase the general viewers.
Error: advirtising Suggestion: advertising
Sentence: Furthermore, the marketing department present the report of only the past year, but there is no report or survey which presents the scenerion of several years.
Error: scenerion Suggestion: scenario
Sentence: Or there is also anothe probable scenerio that the content of the production of that company is not up to the mark for general viewers.
Error: anothe Suggestion: another
Error: scenerio Suggestion: scenario
Sentence: The marketing department should also make a survey about the reaction of the attended viewers about the quality in general, not for the specific movies and also what the general viewers expectected content.
Error: expectected Suggestion: expected
Sentence: In conclusion, only allocating great share of budget to the advirtisement cannot help to reach to the prospective viewers.
Error: advirtisement Suggestion: advertisement
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samples:
https://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/following-taken-me…
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 350 350
No. of Characters: 1804 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.325 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.154 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.704 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 74 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.444 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.021 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.568 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 59, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rection of super screen movie production presents his speculation about the low n...
^^
Line 3, column 133, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'mention'
Suggestion: mention
...iewers for certain movies. But does not mentioned the percentage rate and how much the po...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 93, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'movie'?
Suggestion: movie
...itive reviews, these are for a specific movies. That means, the target audiences of th...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, if, so, then, well, apart from, in conclusion, in general, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 55.5748502994 90% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1854.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 350.0 441.139720559 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.29714285714 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32530772707 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77533744961 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 172.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.491428571429 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 580.5 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.5628988786 57.8364921388 70% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.0 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.4444444444 23.324526521 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.70786347227 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.196216976461 0.218282227539 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0580936284922 0.0743258471296 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0562727984067 0.0701772020484 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0983421960186 0.128457276422 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0353606972706 0.0628817314937 56% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.3550499002 90% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.46 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.01 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 98.500998004 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.