A university education is essential to success in life

Essay topics:

A university education is essential to success in life.

Every-one try to be successful in their life. Although some people believe that university education is urgent to be successful in life, someone are defiant and believe that it is not essential for being successful in life. In my opinion it is important and I have some reasons to support my idea.
The first and the most important reason is that, by study at university people can learn every things that they want for their favorite job in future. They can improve their knowledge about the major that they like. For instance, I really liked to be Architect, so I study architecture at university and I am so happy about that because now I have a lot of information about architect and I can work in a job that I like. The important part is that finding a good job which like it’s a big success in everyone life because everyone spend most of their time to work. Also by finding a good job every one can make money which in my opinion is so important to be a successful people.
The second reason is that, when some one goes to university they have contact with other people. By doing so they improve their society skills by going to university. For example, I have a brother who study at university, he is so skillful to contact with everyone and every one knows him as a friendly person. On the other hand my cousin who is the same age with my brother does not go to university. He is a kind person but he can not communicate with others so many people knows him as a shy person.
In conclusion, I completely agree about a university education is essential to success in life. Because, to begin with, they can improve their knowledge and find a good job and make money which is really important factors for a successful person. Additionally, they can improve society skills which is so important for communicate with others.

Votes
Average: 8.3 (15 votes)
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Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 146, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'someone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...rgent to be successful in life, someone are defiant and believe that it is not esse...
^^^
Line 2, column 141, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...s that they want for their favorite job in future. They can improve their knowledge about...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 571, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...ryone spend most of their time to work. Also by finding a good job every one can mak...
^^^^
Line 2, column 686, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...so important to be a successful people. The second reason is that, when some one...
^^^^
Line 3, column 33, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'someone'?
Suggestion: someone
...le. The second reason is that, when some one goes to university they have contact wi...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, really, second, so, for example, for instance, in conclusion, in my opinion, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 44.0 43.0788530466 102% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 52.1666666667 86% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1507.0 1977.66487455 76% => OK
No of words: 332.0 407.700716846 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.53915662651 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.2685907696 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63258353727 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 137.0 212.727598566 64% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.41265060241 0.524837075471 79% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 504.9 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.998501064 48.9658058833 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.1875 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.75 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.1875 5.45110844103 150% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.238469532095 0.236089414692 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106598138686 0.076458572812 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.179824796792 0.0737576698707 244% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.198766490642 0.150856017488 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.15164257361 0.0645574589148 235% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 11.7677419355 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.05 10.9000537634 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.53 8.01818996416 81% => OK
difficult_words: 40.0 86.8835125448 46% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.