62. Leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them. 事实
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The speaker asserts that leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them. I partly agree with this point that in a historical perspective of view leaders are created by demands. However, leaders do not only negatively fulfill the demands placed on them but also actively take in part to elaborate and refine the demands. Leaders are distinguished from other common employees for their ability to refine, discover and invest in the uncovered demands.
Admittedly, from a historical perspective, leaders are seemingly created by demands of other people. Each team needs a leader, who can carry them to make the common goal. Leaders with certain characteristics are elected according to demands. In the gathering-collecting society, where people’s physiological needs were at first place, tribe leaders often good at finding food and water-resource. During the eras of wars, due to the public’s strong want to ending the war as quickly as possible, leaders with brilliant military intelligence staged out, such as Mao Zedong, Charles de Gaulle, Stalin, were elected. In the peaceful era, public seeks for political leaders who can enhance the sense of safety and bring further development. To respond to the public’s demands, president Obama promised to carry medical reforms which benefit low-income citizens, president Xi promised to regulate the estate markets and provide affordable residences for new urban residents. Through the overviews of three periods of time, we found that the attributes of political leaders, which made them elected, are closely related to the public’s demand.
This perfect match between leaders’ attributes and public’s demands makes us think that leaders are created by the demands. The under assumption is that, if there is no such demands the corresponding leaders will not exist either. However, this assumption is oversimplified and failed to discuss several questions: who creates the demands and whether leaders could only negatively be chosen according to the demands or not?
While the speaker asserts that leaders are created by the demands, I seriously question the word “demand”. Who proposes these demands? Who decides which demand is more urgent and should be prioritized over others? In the field of politics, the public, the electors are supposed to be the most adequate people to propose their demands. However, it is impossible for all citizens to reach a consensus about which demands are most urgent, about the great number of populations, the differences in their social status, education backgrounds and incomes. This problem applies also to the field of commerce. We rarely see one report telling us about all citizen’s current demands in politicians, or all consumers’ demands for products, not to say we chose leaders according to the reported demands. Except for the public, scholars are suitable to propose demands. Through observation, interview and field survey, they can portray the public’s demand in a relative scientific way. However, scholars are often financed either by nations or by private companies, who play the role of leader. Thus, scholars’ investigation into demands presents leader’s active attitude in searching public demands. To conclude, although the speaker contends that leaders are created by the demands, we cannot find the actor who place these demands on leaders. In contrast, we found that leaders of one country or of a company usually support research into public demands and they assume actively the responsibility to satisfy these demands.
Furthermore, successful leaders do not only analyze public’s current demands but also anticipate, undiscovered and create their future demands. To anticipate future, it requests leaders to have brilliant insights, sensitive observation, extraordinary creativity and accurate judgement. It is these characters that makes them leaders and differentiate them from common workers. Facebook, a online social community created by Mark Zuckerberg, has brought unprecedented communication methods to people and changed our social behaviors. Alipay, an application of payment found by Yun MA, allows people to exchange with digital moneys and has changed the former concept of currency which has been prevalent for thousand years. Mark Zuckerberg and Yun Ma are two influential leaders in the business world. Their experiences prove that successful leaders are good at self-searching potential demands, raising new demands and creating unprecedented products.
To conclude, in a historical perspective of view, leaders are seemingly created by demands for the match between their attributes and the public’s demands. However, in reality there is no real actor who places these demands on leaders and force them to fulfill the public’s needs. Leaders actively search, define and materialize people’s demands. Just as Steve Jobs used to say that people do not know what they really want, until someday you show it to them.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 402, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to accord'.
Suggestion: to accord
...leaders could only negatively be chosen according to the demands or not? While the spe...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 393, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ate them from common workers. Facebook, a online social community created by Mark...
^
Line 9, column 712, Rule ID: NODT_DOZEN[1]
Message: Use simply: 'a thousand'.
Suggestion: a thousand
...f currency which has been prevalent for thousand years. Mark Zuckerberg and Yun Ma are t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 957, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ds and creating unprecedented products. To conclude, in a historical perspective...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, really, so, thus, while, except for, in contrast, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.5258426966 154% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 28.0 14.8657303371 188% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 11.3162921348 230% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 53.0 33.0505617978 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 100.0 58.6224719101 171% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 12.9106741573 108% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 4287.0 2235.4752809 192% => OK
No of words: 766.0 442.535393258 173% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.59660574413 5.05705443957 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.26086542369 4.55969084622 115% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.0764186079 2.79657885939 110% => OK
Unique words: 373.0 215.323595506 173% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.486945169713 0.4932671777 99% => OK
syllable_count: 1312.2 704.065955056 186% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 6.24550561798 224% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 7.0 4.99550561798 140% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 17.0 4.38483146067 388% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 39.0 20.2370786517 193% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 48.456138622 60.3974514979 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.923076923 118.986275619 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.641025641 23.4991977007 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.58974358974 5.21951772744 50% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.97078651685 121% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 28.0 10.2758426966 272% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.211127270478 0.243740707755 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0595085632845 0.0831039109588 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0351689951117 0.0758088955206 46% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.131246509401 0.150359130593 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0234272143539 0.0667264976115 35% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 14.1392134831 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.8420337079 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.1743820225 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.2 12.1639044944 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.95 8.38706741573 107% => OK
difficult_words: 212.0 100.480337079 211% => Less difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.