Do you agree or disagree?
The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than
it was in the past?
In today's world, because of lots of "Technological Problems" which provide a particular life condition for people, they do not consider their relatives as much as they did in the past. As far as I am concerned, there are two different ideas toward this question. Some people think that relatives' importance is increasing by time, while others believe otherwise. I subscribe to the latter one, and there are several reasons to name. Three of which—that is—people are so far from each other, life is so busy for people, and life condition is so hard for humankinds, are the most conspicuous ones.
The first important reason that I want to discuss is about importance of money in people's life. Now a day, because of hard economic climate, young men or women have to travel around different cities to occupy a position. Therefore, they are far from their family and relatives. Besides, they are forced to limit their relation with family members, and they should not depend on their relatives anymore. Imagine a situation, a teenager goes to another city for earning money, he or she will have limited relation with their relatives because of the cost of communication and the occupation business.
The second reason that comes to mind is that hard life situation prevents parents from having a lot of children in comparison to the past times. As a result, number of family members is decreasing and there will be few relatives in the next generation which family members can communicate with them. So, this phenomenon forces people to limit their relationship with their relatives, or find friends to occupy relatives' empty place. To exemplify, my parents preferred to have less children, because they wanted to provide the best facilities for them, and grew them up in the most appropriate manner. As a result, I do not have brother, and my sister does not have sister.
Last but not least, now days, people are so busy with their own works. Earning money, children's school and etc. Make family members' life so busy. Consequently, they do not have enough time to be with their relatives. By this, I mean the hard situation pushes people into seclusion and less communication with others. For example, a family which contains four people is so busy by children school tasks. Besides, parents are worried about children's future and their safety in society. All of these provide busy situation that lessen their connection with their relatives.
All in all, to sum up what I've outlined above, in contrast to some people's idea, the majority of society think that importance of relatives is decreasing gradually by time. People's anxieties, their distance from other relatives, and life which is very hard in today's world, provide a situation in which people are force to cut their connection with other relatives, and it will result in less importance of them in every one's life.
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the majority of society think that
the majority of society thinks that
people are force to cut their connection with
people are forced to cut their connection with
flaws:
Don't need to list reasons in the introduction paragraph.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 487 350
No. of Characters: 2331 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.698 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.786 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.534 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 162 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 115 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 79 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.292 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.696 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.489 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.081 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5