some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged . others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults .
Now days you can see a lot of children compete with each others in school or other places to achieve first place . Some people believe that they should be encouraged to compete in order to perform better . But others consider that children should be taught to co-operate and attend in group works . They think it make them more useful people when they become adults .
You may see a school competition which make children try harder for their aim . Firstly encouraging children to compete make them use all of their ability to act in best way . It gives them more courage and show them there are people to support them . Thus they significantly perform better . As an illustration in sports competition you can see effect of audience on children ' s activity .
In the other hand society needs team work rather than individual job . First of all when children are taught to co-operate with each other they learn how to attend as part of group indeed make them see people in the group as partner not a competitor who is against them . It make children perform better in their society when they grow up . Secondly it teaches them how to rely on each others work . In society sometimes they should trust each other . Thus they need to refer to each other experience .
Finally I think children should be taught group work more than compete . It is useful for their future and for society . They can perform better in organizations which need more team work . I think it should be a little encouragement for them to make them use more effort but not make them see their partner as an enemy .
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2013-08-09 | zeafba | 40 | view |
| 2012-08-09 | iceecreami | 65 | view |
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- today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of society in which they are sold . to what extent do you agree or disagree ? 55
- some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged . others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults . 40
- the chart below shows the different levels of post school qualification in Australia and the proportion of men and women who held them in 1999 53
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Sentence: Now days you can see a lot of children compete with each others in school or other places to achieve first place .
Description: The fragment Now days is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace Now days with Nowadays
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to each and others
Sentence: Firstly encouraging children to compete make them use all of their ability to act in best way .
Description: The token in is not usually followed by an adjective, superlative
Suggestion: Refer to in and best
Sentence: It make children perform better in their society when they grow up .
Description: The fragment It make children is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace make with verb, past tense
Sentence: Secondly it teaches them how to rely on each others work .
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to each and others
Sentence: Finally I think children should be taught group work more than compete .
Description: A conjunction, subordinating is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to than and compete
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Different Words: 128 200
Read a good grammar book.
Don't put a space before punctuation marks.
Always put a space after punctuation marks. E-rater is sensitive.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 278 350
No. of Characters: 1267 1500
No. of Different Words: 128 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.083 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.558 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.312 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 85 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 49 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 26 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.632 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.227 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.526 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.342 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.497 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5