TPO 54. The Salton Sea in California is actually a salty inland lake. The level of salt in the lake's water—what scientists call its salinity—has been increasing steadily for years because the lake's water is evaporating faster than it is being replaced by rainfall or rivers. If the trend continues, the lake's water will soon become so salty that the lake will be unable to support fish and bird populations. The lake would then become essentially a dead zone. Fortunately, there are several ways to reverse the trend that is threatening the lake's health.
One option is direct removal of salt from the lake's water in special desalination facilities. Water from the lake would be pumped into the facilities and heated. This would cause the water to evaporate into steam, while salt and other materials dissolved in the water would be left behind. The steam would then be cooled down and returned to the lake as salt-free water. Gradually, the high salt levels would be reduced and the lake’s overall health would be restored.
Another possible solution is to dilute the salt level in the lake with water from the ocean. Since water in the Pacific Ocean is 20 percent less salty than water in the lake, bringing ocean water into the lake would decrease the lake’s salinity. The ocean water could be delivered through pipelines or canals.
Yet another solution would be to control the lake's salinity by constructing walls to divide the lake into several sections. In the smaller sections, salinity would be allowed to increase. However, in the main and largest section, salinity would be reduced and controlled by, among other things, directing all the freshwater from small rivers in the area to flow into that main section of the lake.
题目音频：
play
00:00/02:15收起原文
Now listen to part of a lecture on the topic you just read about.
It would be great if we could stop the lake salt level from increasing and save its fish and bird populations. But the solutions you just read about aren't realistic or practical.
First, sure, taking salt out of the lake by desalination would reduce salinity, but it would present some serious problems as well. For example, as you've read, water pumped into desalination facilities evaporates and leaves behind solid materials that would dissolve in the water. Well, the solid materials that desalination facilities leave behind would pose a health risk. The materials will be mostly salt, but they would also include other types of chemicals. Some of the chemicals would be toxic, like selenium. If the wind spread selenium and other chemicals into the air and people breathe them in, that would be very dangerous to people's health.
Second, the idea of bringing ocean water into the lake, again, this would reduce salinity. But as you've read, it would require constructing pipelines or canals. The problem is that the local government may not have enough resources to pay for such major construction. The nearest shoreline of the Pacific Ocean is 100 kilometers away. Pipelines and canals are very expensive to build over such long distances.
As for the third solution, dividing the lake into sections by building a system of walls. Well, that's unlikely to work for very long. That's because the Salton Seas is located in a region that experiences frequent and sometimes intense geological activity, like earthquakes. That activity would almost certainly destroy the walls separating the different sections. So while this solution might work for a short while, the walls would likely collapse the first time there is a major earthquake. And water from the special sections with high salinity would mix back in with the low-salinity salinity from the main section.
The reading states that salt increases in the lake's water and if it continues happens, then it will be challenging to live fish and bird populations in the lake. The author provides three ways to save the lake's health and supports each of the reasons. However, the professor says that it would be great if we could reduce the salt level from the lake and opposes each of the author's ideas.
First, the author claims that direct salt can be removed by using special desalination facilities, which will help to reduce the high salt levels in the lake. However, the speaker says that it is possible, but the problem is that water will evaporate and it will leave solid material behind of it, and it will also leave some chemical particles, which would be toxic. Because this chemical substance contains selenium, which will come out in the air. People will take it with breath, and it will be so dangerous for human health.
Second, the author posits that it is possible to dilute the salt level in the lake with water from the ocean. As Pacific ocean's water is less salty, so it will be possible to bring the water through canals from there. However, the speaker refutes this point by saying that construction of the pipeline could be expansive. He mentions that local government will not have the resource to do it.
Third, the reading passage argues that constructing wall can divide the lake into several sections so that smaller portions will allow increase salt and more significant part will be less salt. However, the professor opposes this by discussing that this process will be unlikely long. He says that there can be the earthquake which will separate the wall and less salt water will mix with high salt water. That's why the professor says that all of the author's ways are impractical.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
The structure and content are right on the point.
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flaws:
No. of Words: 314 250
Write the essay in 20 minutes. It is wordy, like in this paragraph:
it is possible, but the problem is that water will evaporate and it will leave solid material behind of it, and it will also leave some chemical particles, which would be toxic. Because this chemical substance contains selenium, which will come out in the air. People will take it with breath, and it will be so dangerous for human health.
there are a lot of 'it', 'will'...
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Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
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and put topics like: TPO 02, TPO 20, then we can understand which topic.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 12
No. of Words: 314 250
No. of Characters: 1456 1200
No. of Different Words: 148 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.21 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.637 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.254 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 65 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.933 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.362 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.733 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.362 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.557 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4
Can I use passive voice in
Can I use passive voice in the writing?
Passive voice is not
Passive voice is not recommended in some academic writings, but we still like users write some passive voice sentences to make more sentence varieties.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 116, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'living'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'challenge' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: living
...es happens, then it will be challenging to live fish and bird populations in the lake. ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 206, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'lakes'' or 'lake's'?
Suggestion: lakes'; lake's
... author provides three ways to save the lakes health and supports each of the reasons...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 407, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...lt water will mix with high salt water. Thats why the professor says that all of the ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 441, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...ater. Thats why the professor says that all of the authors ways are impractical.
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, second, so, then, third
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 10.4613686534 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 5.04856512141 436% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 10.0 7.30242825607 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 12.0772626932 141% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 22.412803532 143% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 29.0 30.3222958057 96% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 5.01324503311 80% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1494.0 1373.03311258 109% => OK
No of words: 314.0 270.72406181 116% => OK
Chars per words: 4.75796178344 5.08290768461 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20951839842 4.04702891845 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.3132158535 2.5805825403 90% => OK
Unique words: 155.0 145.348785872 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.493630573248 0.540411800872 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 445.5 419.366225166 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.55342163355 90% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 3.25607064018 61% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.23620309051 109% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.25165562914 160% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.51434878587 198% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 2.5761589404 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 13.0662251656 115% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 21.2450331126 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.207108406 49.2860985944 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.6 110.228320801 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.9333333333 21.698381199 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.6 7.06452816374 51% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 4.19205298013 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 4.33554083885 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 4.45695364238 45% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.27373068433 187% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.21665177259 0.272083759551 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.088681566419 0.0996497079465 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0665030275505 0.0662205650399 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.163778705908 0.162205337803 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0476793816474 0.0443174109184 108% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 13.3589403974 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 53.8541721854 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 11.0289183223 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.33 12.2367328918 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.9 8.42419426049 94% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 63.6247240618 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.7273730684 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.498013245 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.