In order to get a higher promotion and salary many people chose to improve their job performance in two ways Which one do you prefer Why To do additional work and assignments To actively participate in the group work

Essay topics:

In order to get a higher promotion and salary, many people chose to improve their job performance in two ways. Which one do you prefer? Why?
  -- To do additional work and assignments
  -- To actively participate in the group work"

Young people nowadays want to pursue higher standard of living in many different ways. Some exploit their rest time to do part-time job beside the main work while others try to impress their boss by doing extra works in company. Personally speaking, I believe that people should volunteer to do additional assignments to enhance their performance so that they can get a higher promotion and salary. To support this stance, following explanation will elaborate on my perspective.

To begin with, office workers may easily impress their leaders by requesting additional activities. The leaders will impress by their hard-working, passion, and enthusiasm in job. Moreover, when office employee can finish their job beside normal assignments, those works can perceive higher points in administrators eyes. As the time go on, they can see potential capacity and promote people to higher ranking.

Moreover, by do additional works, the employees can receive money from those assignments or projects. Also, they could use those money to invest on others activities such as house or stock markets. Therefore, It helps them enhance their standard of life in many ways. My older sister can demonstrate this point. When she graduated from economic university in United States, she got offer from the big company. At the beginning, she worked really hard and always requested for addition assignments. She earned really high income every months. However, instead of waste money on shopping, she invested the money on stock and won million of dollars in 2017.

To wrap it up, in order to get promotion and high salary, workers should choose to do extra works. It gets impression from their chief and earn an amount of money from those jobs.

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Average: 6.5 (2 votes)
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2019-03-03 persepolistmm 91 view
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 67, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
... to pursue higher standard of living in many different ways. Some exploit their rest time to d...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 124, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this money' or 'those moneys', 'those monies'?
Suggestion: this money; those moneys; those monies
...ments or projects. Also, they could use those money to invest on others activities such as ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 628, Rule ID: NODT_DOZEN[1]
Message: Use simply: 'a million'.
Suggestion: a million
...she invested the money on stock and won million of dollars in 2017. To wrap it up, ...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, may, moreover, really, so, therefore, thus, while, such as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 0.0 15.1003584229 0% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 11.0286738351 36% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 43.0788530466 72% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 52.1666666667 84% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1459.0 1977.66487455 74% => OK
No of words: 280.0 407.700716846 69% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.21071428571 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.09062348924 4.48103885553 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64829315459 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 212.727598566 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.6 0.524837075471 114% => OK
syllable_count: 437.4 618.680645161 71% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.8008838257 48.9658058833 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 81.0555555556 100.406767564 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.5555555556 20.6045352989 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.11111111111 5.45110844103 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.288727230344 0.236089414692 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0822586187529 0.076458572812 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0786821906545 0.0737576698707 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.185112970434 0.150856017488 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0967372258443 0.0645574589148 150% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.64 10.9000537634 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.93 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 86.8835125448 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.