105. The following appeared in a memo from the vice president of Butler Manufacturing.
"During the past year, workers at Butler Manufacturing reported 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than workers at nearby Panoply Industries, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than ours. A recent government study reports that fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers are significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents. If we shorten each of our work shifts by one hour, we can improve Butler Manufacturing's safety record by ensuring that our employees are adequately rested."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
in the given argument, the author state the reasons for conclusion he/she has drawn. the author states the following as reasons: a) more number of accidents compared to the other plant b) the theory set forth by experts. however none of these reasons prove to have any substance.
Firstly,the comparison drawn is not apt and reliable as it has several assumptions. the author failed to mention if butler manufacturing and panoply industries plant are in the same line of work. there is not one statement in the argument which tells us about the machinery or equipment used in both of these companies. therefore, it is presumptuous to believe that the comparison of 30% more on the job accidents are drawn on equal platforms. further more, we do not know the number of workers other number of shifts panoply industry plant has. if it has more number of ships or more number of workers then butler manufacturing, the lesser number of working hours are justified.
secondly, the experts only talk about the significant factors they've concluded in their works but there is no evidence which suggest that these theories are completely applicable to butler manufacturing. also, there has been no mention of whether the current working as resulting in sleep deprivation for the workers. Lastly, the assumption that more of sleep results in increased productivity is highly debatable. no solid evidence proves this and thus, could be considered weak.
the overall argument has been full of weak assumptions and baseless conclusions. the author could have strengthened the claims by providing solid evidence supporting his theory. For example, if the author had perhaps been more descriptive about the work of the experts or if the author could have given as a better insight into the conditions at panoply industries plant, the claim could have been strengthened. in the present form the argument is flawed due to lack of substantial evidence in support of its claim.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 7 15
No. of Words: 326 350
No. of Characters: 1603 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.249 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.917 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.699 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 87 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 46.571 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 20.205 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.857 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.478 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.79 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.186 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
in the given argument, the author state th...
^^
Line 1, column 86, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...easons for conclusion he/she has drawn. the author states the following as reasons:...
^^^
Line 1, column 184, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...of accidents compared to the other plant b the theory set forth by experts. howev...
^^
Line 1, column 221, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...ant b the theory set forth by experts. however none of these reasons prove to have any...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 8, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...ns prove to have any substance. Firstly,the comparison drawn is not apt and reliabl...
^^^^
Line 2, column 84, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...reliable as it has several assumptions. the author failed to mention if butler manu...
^^^
Line 2, column 196, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...ies plant are in the same line of work. there is not one statement in the argument wh...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 320, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...ipment used in both of these companies. therefore, it is presumptuous to believe that the...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 444, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Further
...accidents are drawn on equal platforms. further more, we do not know the number of work...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 525, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...f workers other number of shifts panoply industry plant has. if it has more numbe...
^^
Line 2, column 547, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
... of shifts panoply industry plant has. if it has more number of ships or more num...
^^
Line 2, column 581, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'number' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: number
... has. if it has more number of ships or more number of workers then butler manufacturing, t...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 681, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Secondly
... number of working hours are justified. secondly, the experts only talk about the signif...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 743, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: they've
...only talk about the significant factors theyve concluded in their works but there is n...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 885, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...ely applicable to butler manufacturing. also, there has been no mention of whether t...
^^^^
Line 2, column 1096, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: No
...eased productivity is highly debatable. no solid evidence proves this and thus, co...
^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...is and thus, could be considered weak. the overall argument has been full of weak ...
^^^
Line 3, column 81, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...k assumptions and baseless conclusions. the author could have strengthened the clai...
^^^
Line 3, column 412, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...the claim could have been strengthened. in the present form the argument is flawed...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, lastly, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, thus, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.9520958084 31% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 13.6137724551 37% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 55.5748502994 72% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1638.0 2260.96107784 72% => OK
No of words: 323.0 441.139720559 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.07120743034 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23936324884 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80981542708 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.538699690402 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 505.8 705.55239521 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.7114635024 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.3529411765 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 23.324526521 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.11764705882 5.70786347227 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 5.15768463074 58% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 19.0 5.25449101796 362% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159757231185 0.218282227539 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0463228397253 0.0743258471296 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0545228790473 0.0701772020484 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0903157683818 0.128457276422 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0665873282895 0.0628817314937 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 98.500998004 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Minimum four paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.