The chart below show the main reasons for study among
Students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.( IELTS BOOK 5 TEST 2)
The bar charts compare students of distinct ages in terms of why they are studying and whether their employer supports them.
Overall, the graph statists reveal young students between the age of 26- 29 are significantly affected by employers support and getting educations.
Firstly, the figures describe that the proportion of students who study for career purposes is far higher among the younger age groups by 80%, However, as the age increase their ratio for career gradually plunged by 15% respectively. On the other side the percentage of under 26 for interest is slowly growing which is 10 to 12% approximately. However The gap between these two proportions narrows as students get older, and the figures for those in their forties are the same, at about 40%. Students aged over 49 overwhelmingly study for interest (70%) rather than for professional reasons (less than 20%).
Secondly, initial period, 60% of students aged under 26 are supported by their employers. By contrast, the 30-39 age group is the most self-sufficient, with only 30% being given time off and help with fees. The figures rise slightly for students in their forties and for those aged 50 or more.
In short, the bar figures reckons that the young student like more studies. While, the oldest students are more likely to study for interest. Hence, Employer support is more commonly given to younger students.
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whether their employer supports them.
whether their employers support them.
the graph statists reveal young students between the age of 26- 29 are significantly affected by employers support and getting educations.
the graph statistics reveal that young students between the age of 26- 29 are significantly affected by employers' support and getting educations.
as the age increase their ratio...
as the age increases their ratio...
Sentence: Overall, the graph statists reveal young students between the age of 26- 29 are significantly affected by employers support and getting educations.
Error: statists Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Words: 229 200
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4
better to have 4 paragraphs:
para 1: introduction
para 2: body 1
para 3: body 2
para 4: conclusion
sample:
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http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/charts-below-show-uk-and-usa-energy…
or
para 1: introduction
para 2: conclusion
para 3: body 1
para 4: body 2
sample:
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http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/table-below-gives-information-about…
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 12 10
No. of Words: 229 200
No. of Characters: 1118 1000
No. of Different Words: 137 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.89 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.882 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.598 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 78 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.083 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.342 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.368 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.647 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.056 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4