Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The writer asserts that the reason behind the decline in deer populations is that they're no longer able to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea. According to the writer, the primary reason behind this is the melting of the sea ice caused by Global Warming. Even though the writer's assertion may be correct, further evidence is required to establish its correctness completely.
Firstly, it is not clear if the arctic deer follow the tradition just out of habit, or do they really need to do it for their sustenance? It might be the case that a single island has enough food to support its deer population and the deer don't actually need to migrate to fulfill their food requirements. Therefore, an in-depth biological analysis needs to be done on the behavorial patterns of the arctic deer in Canada's arctic regions to establish the requirement of migration. If evidence is found supporting the fact that a single island is not enough to support a whole lifetime of a deer and that it is imperative for them to move from island to island, then the writer's argument will be substantiated.
Second, we don't know the extent of the effects of Global Warming on the Canadian Islands. We know that global warming has varied effects throughout the world because of which, we need more evidence to support the claim that global warming has made it impossible for the deer to move between islands. Also, we need to know if global warming affects the sea ice during the migration season of the deer. The writer's statement hints that the migrational behavior of the deer might be seasonal in nature, and hence their traditions will only be hindered if the global warming affects them during that season. Therefore, we need to find evidence studying the effects of global warming in detail in that region. If the evidence proves that indeed it has become impossible for the deer to move between islands, the writer's claim will be further strengthened. However, an evidence pointing in the opposite direction will weaken the claim.
Finally, we need to look for other possible reasons behind the dwindling deer population as well. It is possible that the increase in global warming has simply coincided with the oncoming of other factors detrimental to the sustenance of deer. For example, it can be an increase in the population of the deer predators in the area which has resulted in this fall, or some disease might have affected the plant population making it unfit for consumption by the deer. In these cases, it will be erronuous to connect co-relation (increase in global warming) and causation (other factors). Therefore, a complete biological survey and analysis is required to get to the root of the cause behind the decreasing deer population. If we find that there are other factors contributing towards the observations, the writer's argument will be weakened.
Therefore, we can say that the writer's claim can not be simply taken at its face value. A more cogent line of argument is required to do a complete assessment of the conclusion. More evidence will be helpful in establishing the validity of the statement and will help us get to the truth.
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| 2023-07-17 | okazaki11 | 72 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 542 350
No. of Characters: 2593 1500
No. of Different Words: 223 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.825 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.784 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.606 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 200 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 145 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 99 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.565 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.059 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.696 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.329 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.538 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.179 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 83, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: they're
...the decline in deer populations is that theyre no longer able to follow their age-old ...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 299, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'writers'' or 'writer's'?
Suggestion: writers'; writer's
...used by Global Warming. Even though the writers assertion may be correct, further evide...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 241, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...upport its deer population and the deer dont actually need to migrate to fulfill the...
^^^^
Line 5, column 671, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'writers'' or 'writer's'?
Suggestion: writers'; writer's
...to move from island to island, then the writers argument will be substantiated. Se...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 12, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... will be substantiated. Second, we dont know the extent of the effects of Globa...
^^^^
Line 9, column 406, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'writers'' or 'writer's'?
Suggestion: writers'; writer's
...g the migration season of the deer. The writers statement hints that the migrational be...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 802, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'writers'' or 'writer's'?
Suggestion: writers'; writer's
...tributing towards the observations, the writers argument will be weakened. Therefo...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, finally, first, firstly, hence, however, if, look, may, really, second, so, then, therefore, well, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 28.8173652695 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 30.0 16.3942115768 183% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2655.0 2260.96107784 117% => OK
No of words: 539.0 441.139720559 122% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92578849722 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81833721656 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67076233588 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 225.0 204.123752495 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.417439703154 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 819.9 705.55239521 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 4.96107784431 242% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.5796159137 57.8364921388 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.434782609 119.503703932 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.4347826087 23.324526521 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.69565217391 5.70786347227 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.192496907565 0.218282227539 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.057098582095 0.0743258471296 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0609851817877 0.0701772020484 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103945599331 0.128457276422 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.106992050803 0.0628817314937 170% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 14.3799401198 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.61 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.18 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 98.500998004 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.