TPO34_task2
In today modern era, education has a vital role in forming individuals’ future. So it is a crucial factor in children’s lives. Also, technological developments affect all aspects of human beings’ lives including education. While some people believe that today educating children is easier rather than before, I am of the opinion that educating children is more difficult than past, because of new technologies’ impacts. As they have more facilities, they spend so much time on smartphones and online games. As a result they forget about studying. In what follows, I will cogently pinpoint my most conspicuous reasons to justify my point of view.
To begin with, young generation are kind of addicted to the technology in comparison with older people. That is why they cannot focus on course materials in the classes or home with the absence of smartphones, games, etc. So, they cannot learn as efficient as before, and it makes educating children harder than before. My cousin is a compelling example to clarify this. He used to play online games with computer or mobile phone before the age 7. While he became a first-year student in school, his mind was always involved in games, and he thought how to reach next levels even in the classes. Thus, he did not understand the course materials well, thereby his parents hardly make him study, to get acceptable grade.
Another equally significant point is that technological games are more interesting and amusing for children than studying. As they like these entertainments more, they spend much time on them, and do not have enough energy and interest to study. As a result, studying seems boring to them and they do not educate as easy as before. To illustrate, my cousin always prefers to play online games rather than studying. As he says, online games are interesting and have different stories in per level which attracts him to continue playing. After playing a long time, he becomes mentally and physically tired, and prefers to rest and get fresh to continue gaming instead of studying. In the other words, he is always seeking new stories in the game that brings him pleasure, and makes playing more interesting than studying.
All in all, when it comes to comparison, I tend to argue that in today complex world, technological progress impacts educating children and makes it more difficult than before. As children attain more entertainment through gaming, they prefer it to studying, and it makes educating children harder than the past.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-11-03 | faatemebaagheri | 3 | view |
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 528, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...h time on smartphones and online games. As a result they forget about studying. In...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, so, thus, well, while, kind of, as a result, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 44.0 43.0788530466 102% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2114.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 416.0 407.700716846 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08173076923 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51620172871 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84065460802 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 226.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.543269230769 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 660.6 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 11.0 3.51792114695 313% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 6.0 1.86738351254 321% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.1551404768 48.9658058833 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.9130434783 100.406767564 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0869565217 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.26086956522 5.45110844103 60% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 11.7677419355 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.55 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 86.8835125448 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.