Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Commitment to your ethics is good for oneself. Commitment shows that how much a person passionate towards a thing. Passage suggests that people become crtical to certain idea or policy when they are most deeply commited to it. In my opinion, I agree with this suggestion and argue that it is good to be commited towards something, but getting most deeply commited can get a person in critcial situation for two reasons.
To begin, When a person gets highly commited towards something, and if doesn't goes right can highly disturb a person mental state. For Example, In India getting into IIT colleges is a dream for millions of students apprearing each year for an entrance exam called IIT-JEE. There are only around ten thousand seats for around more than a million students appearing for it. This build up pressure for students even before tenth grade for start preparing for it. Due to this pressure, students gets highly commited to crack this entrance exam. This deep commitment and societal pressure exposes student to highly critical situation that when unable to crack IIT-JEE 16 years student try to attempt suicide. Hence most deeply committed towards something make it more critical and highly vulnerable for a person.
However, Sometimes being something most critical due to deep commitment gets you highly positive results. A mangalyan ISRO mission is a good example of it. ISRO (Indian Space research organisation) had a mission highly unplanned at the start to send sattelite to MARS. The project seems impossible at the start due to low funding and tight deadlines. The project team made this mission patriotic goal to become the first country to reach MARS in first attempt and third to send satellite to mars. Due to high commitment of the team, low budget and deadlines the project got into highly critical situation. This highly critical situation worked in favor of scientist who found out innovative method to tackle the problem they a facing in this mission. Therefore, sometimes deep commitment and critical situation get back with highly positive and satisfying outputs.
In conclusion, we can clearly say that people who are most deeply committed towards a idea or policy becomes most critical to it. It is for sure that make things critical is not a good idea, but sometimes it can benifit a lot. Critical towards something has both sides as we discussed above.
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- The following appeared in a memo from the vice president of marketing at Dura-Sock, Inc."A recent study of our customers suggests that our company is wasting the money it spends on its patented Endure manufacturing process, which ensures that our socks ar 29
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 72, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ghly commited towards something, and if doesnt goes right can highly disturb a person ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 705, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...6 years student try to attempt suicide. Hence most deeply committed towards something...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 10, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[4]
Message: The adverb 'Sometimes' is usually put after the verb 'being'.
Suggestion: Being Sometimes
...hly vulnerable for a person. However, Sometimes being something most critical due to deep com...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 490, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'mar'.
Suggestion: mar
... attempt and third to send satellite to mars. Due to high commitment of the team, lo...
^^^^
Line 7, column 85, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...e who are most deeply committed towards a idea or policy becomes most critical to...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, however, if, so, therefore, third, for example, in conclusion, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.5258426966 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.4196629213 32% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 33.0505617978 97% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 58.6224719101 75% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 12.9106741573 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1998.0 2235.4752809 89% => OK
No of words: 397.0 442.535393258 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.03274559194 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.55969084622 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52194273657 2.79657885939 90% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 215.323595506 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.501259445844 0.4932671777 102% => OK
syllable_count: 610.2 704.065955056 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.5813873249 60.3974514979 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 90.8181818182 118.986275619 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0454545455 23.4991977007 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.31818181818 5.21951772744 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.13820224719 175% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0578327158632 0.243740707755 24% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0219296312607 0.0831039109588 26% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0306751681005 0.0758088955206 40% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0359977858346 0.150359130593 24% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0100475764394 0.0667264976115 15% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 14.1392134831 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.6 12.1639044944 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.38706741573 94% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 100.480337079 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 11.8971910112 63% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.