The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition. [Specific Task Instruction: Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.]
There has always been heated discussions about the best way to prepare teenagers to be future leaders. Some people argue that a sense of cooperation should be instilled in young people, as that's the crucial skill demanded when working in the government. While, others claim that competition, rather than cooperation, is more essential. This essay is going to argue that, to a large extent, cooperation, instead of competition, should be accentuated to young people.
First and foremost, the ultimate goal for politicians to work in the government should be providing better service to the public. In this sense, people should see each other as commaderies rather than rivals, and thus they need to cooperate, instead of compete, with each other. However, some people might argue that people need to win the general election beforehand to enter the government. For this reason, they suppose that competition is the fundamental skill needed. Nevertheless, there are numerous examples demonstrating that even if people lost in the election, they can still serve the country by cooperating with the winner. For example, Obama asked his rival to visit other countries on behalf of him several times.
Secondly, modern government is an extremely complicated organisation which requires a variety of expertise. However, it is not possible for a single person to have knowledge of everything, and that necessitate the cooperation between people from different areas. For example, economists needs to work together with mathematicians and statisticians to estimate the market prices and demands, and hence implement policies accordingly. On the other hand, if the presidents view everyone else as enemies and only listen to himself, then he would have to make policies blindly. That would lead to calamity of society.
However, in certain circumstances, the sense of competition might also be useful. One such occasions would be when the country is facing external threats or attacks. In this case, governors need to know the strategies to compete with others, simply seeking cooperation with other countries can be useless in this case. Nevertheless, in modern society, wars between countries can be rare, and thus the encouragement of cooperation should be prioritised.
To summarize, this essay has argued that, to a large extent, young people should be installed a sense of cooperation, instead of competition, to work better in the government. That is because the utmost aim for politicians should be to serve the country better instead of compete with each other. What's more, the function of the government also requires people with different expertise to work collaboratively. However, when the country is facing serious external hazards, a sense of competition can also be helpful. Further discussions could be conducted on how to balance the senses of cooperation and competition, so that teenagers can be better prepared to be future leaders.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 190, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: that's
...should be instilled in young people, as thats the crucial skill demanded when working...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 298, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
...ter instead of compete with each other. Whats more, the function of the government al...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, first, hence, however, if, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, still, then, thus, while, for example, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.5258426966 128% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.4196629213 169% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 14.8657303371 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.3162921348 133% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 33.0505617978 76% => OK
Preposition: 66.0 58.6224719101 113% => OK
Nominalization: 27.0 12.9106741573 209% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2489.0 2235.4752809 111% => OK
No of words: 463.0 442.535393258 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.37580993521 5.05705443957 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63868890866 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.99362804029 2.79657885939 107% => OK
Unique words: 224.0 215.323595506 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.483801295896 0.4932671777 98% => OK
syllable_count: 768.6 704.065955056 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 13.0 4.38483146067 296% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 34.0134777208 60.3974514979 56% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 103.708333333 118.986275619 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2916666667 23.4991977007 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.75 5.21951772744 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.83258426966 207% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.191247932071 0.243740707755 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0597545308201 0.0831039109588 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0440717114987 0.0758088955206 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.119241838946 0.150359130593 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0645605072435 0.0667264976115 97% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 14.1392134831 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.8420337079 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.1743820225 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.92 12.1639044944 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.3 8.38706741573 99% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 100.480337079 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 11.8971910112 71% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.