"According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising."
A recent report claims that the number of people attended Super Screen-produced movies has declined during the past year while this company's specific movies received positive reviews from critics. The company blames this decline on the lack of proper advertisements, and concludes that they should increase advertising in the following year. However, before taking any action, the author should shed light on a few questions.
First, the report asserts that the number of moviegoers has decreased during the past year in comparison to that of any other year. However, it fails to include if the company, last year, released as many movies as they had released in prior years. It would be better if the report mentioned the quantity of moviegoers per movie, this way they can make a more reasonable comparison. Maybe, this company were less active the past year, had fewer movies on the screen, and subsequently had less viewers than it had in earlier years. Moreover, maybe last year people were less willing to go to cinemas and watch movies because of recession in economic.
Second, the author claims that their specific movies received many positive reviews, and so their movies were high quality, although they failed to attract viewers. Were all of their movies in the last year highly ranked, or just a few of them? As the author mentions in the argument, specific movies were positively reviewed, while gives no information on the quality of their other movies. Maybe, just a few of movies were success and rest of them were only flops, lowering the overall number of viewers in the past year. The report will be more convincing if it provides more information about all of their movies.
Third, the argument concludes that by increasing and improving advertising, and subsequently increasing people's awareness, they are going to expand their viewership. However, will their movies next year be able to receive positive reviews too? The report should reckon that many things may change in the following year, and make thorough investigation regarding the potential influence of advertising on viewers.
Overall, because the argument makes several unwarranted assumptions, it fails to make a persuasive case that advertising will augment the number of their viewers in the following year.
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were success
were successful
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argument 1 -- not OK. if the report mentioned the quantity of moviegoers per movie, still there could be some loopholes like: maybe the cost of ticket is high; People may watch from Internet or rent DVD; ...
Need to accept the data or evidence from the statement are true, then try to find out loopholes.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- not exactly. You told ' will their movies next year be able to receive positive reviews too?', but positive reviews are not equal to the demand of common people.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 372 350
No. of Characters: 1878 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.392 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.048 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.573 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 148 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.882 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.484 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.706 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.593 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.109 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5