Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying. Use specific reasons and examples to support you answer.
Nowadays having a job is playing a crucial role in our lives. Most people now are seeking for jobs and each one has his/her own criteria when choosing their job. Some people prefer to have a secure job rather than to wait for more suitable one, others do not. In my view, I completely agree that if anyone has a chance to get a secure job, he/she must catch on this chance for a couple of reasons.
First of all, to earn money. Nowadays, no one can live without having a fixed salary especially with increasing life expenses, so money is important to everyone. For example, when we moved to USA, my husband had to study to get his license but the problem was that we have to get money to accommodate our need and other expenses. Although my husband was a pharmacist in our country, but he did not mind to work anything to afford our needing. Therefore, he began to work as a pharmacy technician even though it was not his dream or satisfying job. But he realized that he is the one responsible for his family and need to offer them the basics for their life. As you can see it is important to have a job to get money.
Moreover, it will expand your knowledge and increase your skills. When people do their jobs even if they are satisfying to it or not, they will learn something new and gain more experience. Also, this will help them in the future to get the job they preferred. For instance, as I mentioned before, when my husband had to work as a pharmacy technician, he learned a lot of tasks and increased his skill, like, how to deal with the customer, how to fill the medicine and type fast on the computer. All this skills helped him in the future when he got his license and worked as a pharmacist, he already has a lot of experience in his career. Doing any job will help people at least to gain experience in spite they are satisfactory with it or not.
All in all, having a job is mandatory. Not only because people will earn money, but they also will increase their experience and skills that may help them in the future to find their satisfying job.
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each one has his/her own criteria when choosing their job
each one has his/her own criteria when choosing his jobs
with increasing life expenses
with the increasing life expenses
Although my husband was a pharmacist in our country, but he did not mind to work anything
Description: don't put 'although' 'but' in one sentence.
in spite they are satisfactory with it or not.
Description: Check books how to use 'in spite of', 'Despite '
Not only because people will earn money, but they also will increase
Description: Not only...but also is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?
Sentence: All this skills helped him in the future when he got his license and worked as a pharmacist, he already has a lot of experience in his career.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and skills
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 390 350
No. of Characters: 1630 1500
No. of Different Words: 181 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.444 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.179 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.305 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 96 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 63 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 46 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.526 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.011 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.684 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.32 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.491 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.183 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5