Your university will spend money on dormitory to improve the life quality of students. Which of the following do you think is the best way?
1) Providing a room for quiet study
2) Building an exercise room.
3) Providing an entertainment place (watch films)
Nowadays, education has become the top concern of modern citizens. Recently, there is a heated debate on university's investment to improve students' life quality, some claim that universities should spend money on study rooms or fitting rooms. As for me, I believe that they should spend money on providing an entertainment place, especially considering the benefits to people's health and interpersonal relationship.
Firstly, building an amusement room will boot students to have a healthy lifestyle. To be specific, students are very stressed out these days, and having a room that can provide them a place to take a break from school assignments, can help them have mental relaxation. My friend Mike is a compelling illustration of this. Mike spends at least 10 hours a day at school attending class, preparing for exams, and doing group work, which makes him exhausted every day. After returning to the dormitory, he just wants to have some fun, like watching movies, playing video games with friends, and going for a walk. If we have an entertainment room in the dorm, which will definitely give us some space to relax; however, if the university invests in a studying room, we cannot have these kinds of leisure time, in addition, students can study in the library, which is more suitable for studying. There is no need to build a room for study in our dorm. Thus, I am convinced that the university should provide an entertainment room.
Furthermore, people can find some friends in places like that. To be exact, in the room for fun, people easily find someone with the same interests, such as adoring the same sports, celebrities, films, and books. For instance, a place like that will provide students a chance to expand their friend circle, it also gives some shy people an opportunity to take the first step to make some friends. As I know, the college next door builds amusement rooms in students' dorms, which greatly enhance students' social abilities. A student who used to be afraid of talking with others sends a think letter to the office because this helps him to make his first friend in his life. On the other hand, how could students have a chance to meet new people and improve their interpersonal relationships, if the university chooses the exercise room.
In conclusion, from what has been discussed above, I still maintain that the university should spend money providing an entertainment place.
- TPO 59 3
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 583, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
... be afraid of talking with others sends a think letter to the office because this helps...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, so, still, thus, as for, at least, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 43.0788530466 74% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2026.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 406.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.99014778325 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48881294772 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74229865216 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.568965517241 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 616.5 618.680645161 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.4997584536 48.9658058833 117% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.555555556 100.406767564 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.5555555556 20.6045352989 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.38888888889 5.45110844103 154% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.413241837435 0.236089414692 175% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.129125029529 0.076458572812 169% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0870779750872 0.0737576698707 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.261570889644 0.150856017488 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0438005653558 0.0645574589148 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 11.7677419355 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.96 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.96 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.