Do you agree or disagree. One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job
These days, in our modern world, children need to get ready for the hard life that are waiting for them. In my opinion, parents should do every think they can do to prepare their children for their future job. Best way to do this is by part time job because it will be a little source of income for the child, it will teach them to be more responsible and they will learn something.
First of all, part time working can be a good source of money for the child. I think when a teenager earns some money, he or she will feel how is it to be like an adult. Moreover, they will be less dependent to their parent and this will have a positive impact on them. For example, when I was a teenager, I used to work in my father's company after school and had a good pay. As a result, one summer I went on a trip with my friends and paid for it all by my self.
Second, having a full time job in the future is a hard thing and teenagers need to get ready for it. Having a part time job will show the teenagers that how hard it actually is to earn money. So, they will not spend their money on stuff that are not important. My little brother used to go to video game centers and spent a lot of money there, but, as soon as he got a job he stop going there and saved his moeny.
Finally, part time job can be a great source of education. In a job environment, teenagers learn many things. For example, in some places they can learn to work with computers and that be a great impact on their future job. I learned to work with computers in my old job and that put me ahead of many other students in university.
To conclude, in todays world, teenager need to work part time due to the fact that it will have a good impact on their future work and will teach them many thing such as being a responsible adult.
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- TPO 28 - sec2 70
Sentence: These days, in our modern world, children need to get ready for the hard life that are waiting for them.
Description: The fragment hard life that is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: In my opinion, parents should do every think they can do to prepare their children for their future job.
Description: An article is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to every and think
Best way to do this is
the Best way to do this is
Sentence: My little brother used to go to video game centers and spent a lot of money there, but, as soon as he got a job he stop going there and saved his moeny.
Description: The fragment he stop going is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace stop with verb, past tense
Sentence: For example, in some places they can learn to work with computers and that be a great impact on their future job.
Description: The token that is not usually followed by a verb 'to be', infinitive or imperative
Suggestion: Refer to that and be
Sentence: To conclude, in todays world, teenager need to work part time due to the fact that it will have a good impact on their future work and will teach them many thing such as being a responsible adult.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to todays and world
Sentence: My little brother used to go to video game centers and spent a lot of money there, but, as soon as he got a job he stop going there and saved his moeny.
Error: moeny Suggestion: money
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Different Words: 158 200
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 357 350
No. of Characters: 1398 1500
No. of Different Words: 158 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.347 4.7
Average Word Length: 3.916 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.002 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 63 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 38 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 24 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 13 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.716 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.765 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.343 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.575 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.161 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5