Essay topics:
The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013.
The bar graphs elucidate the number of mobile phone sales made in the world by 5 major companies, namely; Samsung, Apple, Nokia, LG and ZTE from 2009 to 2013.
It is apparent that, the number of sales on Samsung and Apple mobile phones increased while the sales of mobile phones made by Nokia and LG decreased over 5 years. The most popular phones in the world were Samsung and Nokia brands.
The number of mobile phones sold by Samsung and Nokia were highest over the projected periods. The world's demand for Samsung branded mobile phone rose doubled from 200 million to 400 million. Meanwhile...
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flaws:
You forget ZTE.
No. of Words: 206 while No. of Different Words: 89
We are expecting:
No. of Words: 175 while No. of Different Words: 100
Your next task is to find out how to develop same ideas but with less words.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 206 200
No. of Characters: 925 1000
No. of Different Words: 89 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.788 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.49 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.094 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 67 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 36 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 13 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 11 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.608 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.222 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.559 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.75 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.281 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4