Children today are too dependent on computers and electronic entertainment It would be better for them to be outside playing sports and taking part in more traditional pastimes than spending all day indoors Do you agree or disagree with this statement Wri

In this day and age, it can't be denied children are too focused on computers and electronic entertainment. Therefore, it would be better for them to spend time playing sports outside and participating in more traditional pastimes than spending all day indoors. From my point of view, I really think that children should reduce the time spent on computers.

First and foremost, playing sports can boost adolescents' physical health. For example, instead of sitting in front of screens for long hours, infants should play sports to improve their bodies which can help them to be protected from diseases and increase the percentage of growing up successfully.

Moreover, joining in traditional activities could widen children's knowledge about their country's traditions and customs. For example, adolescents can take part in cultural past times to be provided more information or also be taught about traditional games, which they have never played before. That will make them more interested in history and keep them away from the social evils, which electronic entertainment can lead to.

In conclusion, playing outdoor sports and games and joining in traditional pastimes can prevent infants from diseases and make them more keen on history, which can help them concentrate on studying. Furthermore, it also makes them not addicted to computers and electronic devices, then prevents them from social evils.

Votes
Average: 5.6 (2 votes)
Essay Categories
IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 25, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
In this day and age, it cant be denied children are too focused on c...
^^^^
Line 1, column 25, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'cants'?
Suggestion: cants
In this day and age, it cant be denied children are too focused on c...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, furthermore, moreover, really, so, then, therefore, for example, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 13.1623246493 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 7.85571142285 140% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 24.0651302605 79% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 41.998997996 76% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1194.0 1615.20841683 74% => OK
No of words: 220.0 315.596192385 70% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.42727272727 5.12529762239 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.85128510684 4.20363070211 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79238930247 2.80592935109 100% => OK
Unique words: 132.0 176.041082164 75% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.6 0.561755894193 107% => OK
syllable_count: 347.4 506.74238477 69% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 16.0721442886 62% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.0972282962 49.4020404114 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.4 106.682146367 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.7667163134 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.1 7.06120827912 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.67935871743 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.368394244759 0.244688304435 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.150595307069 0.084324248473 179% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.118912853449 0.0667982634062 178% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.229888573492 0.151304729494 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.119785780341 0.056905535591 210% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 13.0946893788 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 50.2224549098 98% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.3001002004 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.21 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.68 8.58950901804 101% => OK
difficult_words: 55.0 78.4519038076 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 25, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
In this day and age, it cant be denied children are too focused on c...
^^^^
Line 1, column 25, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'cants'?
Suggestion: cants
In this day and age, it cant be denied children are too focused on c...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, furthermore, moreover, really, so, then, therefore, for example, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 13.1623246493 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 7.85571142285 140% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 24.0651302605 79% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 41.998997996 76% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1194.0 1615.20841683 74% => OK
No of words: 220.0 315.596192385 70% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.42727272727 5.12529762239 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.85128510684 4.20363070211 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79238930247 2.80592935109 100% => OK
Unique words: 132.0 176.041082164 75% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.6 0.561755894193 107% => OK
syllable_count: 347.4 506.74238477 69% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 16.0721442886 62% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.0972282962 49.4020404114 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.4 106.682146367 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.7667163134 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.1 7.06120827912 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.67935871743 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.368394244759 0.244688304435 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.150595307069 0.084324248473 179% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.118912853449 0.0667982634062 178% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.229888573492 0.151304729494 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.119785780341 0.056905535591 210% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 13.0946893788 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 50.2224549098 98% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.3001002004 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.21 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.68 8.58950901804 101% => OK
difficult_words: 55.0 78.4519038076 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.