Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is better to take risks and explore new things when you are older than when you are young.
Risk is the potential of gaining or losing something of value. There is heated controversy as to whether one should take risk when he or she is old or young. I personally subscribe that it is better for an individual to take risk when he or she is younger rather than older for several reasons, three substantial of which are elaborated upon hereunder.
The most compelling point is that nowadays, people are classified by their wealth, and they seek their fortune in money. Taking reasonable risk brings about one considerable profit, leading to promote their social status, paving the way of following dreams. Considering the fact that one should know that he or she lives once; therefore, they should do their best to spend this precious time in an excellent fashion. Profit derived from taking risk in young age gives one a chance to follow and reach their interests which are specific for the time of youth, giving meaning to their lives.
Another rationale of why I do not concur with taking risk in older age lies in the fact that even though older people are more experienced, the youth are more mentally welcoming to try new things and to take risk in uncertain conditions. For instance, as compared to older people, younger people are adopter of new technologies such as utilizing smart phones, tablets, to name but a few.
Last but not least, people taking risk are not constantly successful, sometimes they lose all of their assets. Young losers are more likely to make up for their detriments as compared to those are older. As a point in view, my uncle has a food factory. Fourteen years ago, when he was twenty eight years old, he become busted inasmuch as increasing the US dollar value in Iran--thanks to Iran's sanctions. Fortunately, ten years later, he managed to completely revive his bankrupt factor. Now, his factory is one of the most leading factories in its industry. If he had become bankrupt when he was old, he might not be able to have time to compensate his loses.
To put in a nutshell, having considering all of the aforementioned ingredients discussed above, I safely endorse the point that the advantages of taking risk in younger age outweigh those of in older age on the ground that younger people are more mentally prepared to exploit detected opportunities, being able to compensate their failures. Moreover, they can use the profit of taking risk to seek their dreams and to be happier.
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- TPO-44 - Independent Writing Task Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing th 76
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 92, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...g of value. There is heated controversy as to whether one should take risk when he or she is ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 393, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an excellent fashion" with adverb for "excellent"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... their best to spend this precious time in an excellent fashion. Profit derived from taking risk in you...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 42, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...o put in a nutshell, having considering all of the aforementioned ingredients discussed ab...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 191, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ng risk in younger age outweigh those of in older age on the ground that younger ...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'if', 'moreover', 'so', 'therefore', 'as to', 'for instance', 'such as']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.190170940171 0.229887763892 83% => OK
Verbs: 0.175213675214 0.158761421928 110% => OK
Adjectives: 0.106837606838 0.0866891130778 123% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0619658119658 0.046263068375 134% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0747863247863 0.0685040099705 109% => OK
Prepositions: 0.115384615385 0.118717715034 97% => OK
Participles: 0.0555555555556 0.0351676179071 158% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.65869027151 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0448717948718 0.0309702414327 145% => OK
Particles: 0.00213675213675 0.00188951952338 113% => OK
Determiners: 0.0576923076923 0.0887237588012 65% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0106837606838 0.0209618222197 51% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0149572649573 0.0139019557991 108% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2436.0 2387.08602151 102% => OK
No of words: 418.0 408.028673835 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.82775119617 5.86048508987 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52162009685 4.48200974243 101% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.349282296651 0.338922669872 103% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.227272727273 0.251872472559 90% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.162679425837 0.174417080927 93% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.11961722488 0.112833075102 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65869027151 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.528708133971 0.524397521467 101% => OK
Word variations: 60.1239613559 59.2087087015 102% => OK
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6684587814 87% => OK
Sentence length: 23.2222222222 20.5533526081 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.2727878449 48.84282405 142% => OK
Chars per sentence: 135.333333333 120.699889404 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2222222222 20.5533526081 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.444444444444 0.644075263715 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.54480286738 72% => OK
Readability: 45.9494949495 45.7405998639 100% => OK
Elegance: 1.15753424658 1.45489161554 80% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.245840893419 0.300154397459 82% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.124549445526 0.103427244359 120% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0712528601155 0.0752933317313 95% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.5437991812 0.497263757937 109% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.181864352431 0.151897553556 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.095034826613 0.114077575197 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0613667167353 0.0781384742642 79% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.281679847421 0.336927656856 84% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0250405969451 0.067059652881 37% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.166995936153 0.210909579961 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0524845406811 0.0618886996521 85% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8870967742 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.86379928315 155% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.91756272401 41% => OK
Positive topic words: 8.0 8.42114695341 95% => OK
Negative topic words: 5.0 2.4623655914 203% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 2.75985663082 72% => OK
Total topic words: 15.0 13.6433691756 110% => OK
---------------------
Rates: 80 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24 Out of 30