you have enough money to purchase either a house or a business. Which would you choose to buy?
There is no doubt that money is the cornerstone for successful individuals. People can secure their dream by possessing a good amount of money at their bank account. Some people, if asked, they would say that they would purchase a house if they have enough money . Others would prefer to open their new business. As far I'm concern, Opening my own business carries better opportunities than buy a house. The basis for my views is because purchase a business is the fastest way to invest your money, satisfy my personality and
We all admitted that making money is not an easy task. People working all their live long just to safe couple of thousand dollars. Others invest their money by deposited it in their bank account or invest with privet investor for few percents as a return. However, a Study conducted at the University Of California indicated that banks and privet are less likely to make money compare with privet owner. After I read this study I decided that I'm not gooing to be a bait for banks or privet investors. Opening my own business, allows me to manage my own investments. As a result, I will have the ability to invest in the most profitable business. On the other hand, I will not only gain 100% of the profits but also make money in a shorter time compare to people who are investing their money with others.
In addition, opening my business help satisfy my eager to challenge. Since I was a teenager I used to challenges myself a lot. From climbing mountains to riding bikes, I used to participate in any challenging activities. By opening my business, I would create different challenges to myself. For example, I would have to produce products, promote it and attract customers. If I buy a home, I would stay on it board and having nothing to challenge.
Admittedly, buying a home has many benefits like feeling secure and sheltered. However, If I waste all my money by buying single home, I would have no money to buy a business. In contrast, If I bought my business first, it would generate enough money to buy a house. As a result, I would own both business and house.
As a conclusion, we can safely say that although house can provide many benefits, buying a business has far more benefits than buying a house. Since buying a business will satisfy me financially and emotionally, I prefer to buy a house if I possess some money.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
purchase a business is the fastest way
purchasing a business is the fastest way
to make money compare with privet owner.
to make money compared with privet owners.
I will not only gain 100% of the profits but also make money in a shorter time compare to people
I will not only gain 100% of the profits but also make money in a shorter time compared to people
opening my business help satisfy my eager to challenge
opening my business helps satisfy my eager to challenges
I used to challenges myself a lot.
I used to challenge myself a lot.
Sentence: After I read this study I decided that I'm not gooing to be a bait for banks or privet investors.
Error: privet Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: gooing Suggestion: going
flaws:
Try not use pronouns as subjects. look:
However, If
I waste all my money by buying single home,
I would have no money to buy a business. In contrast, If
I bought my business first,
it would generate enough money to buy a house. As a result,
I would own both business and house.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 422 350
No. of Characters: 1888 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.532 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.474 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.531 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 134 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.231 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.486 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.462 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.503 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.137 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 263, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...rchase a house if they have enough money . Others would prefer to open their new b...
^^
Line 1, column 321, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...efer to open their new business. As far Im concern, Opening my own business carrie...
^^
Line 1, column 525, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t your money, satisfy my personality and We all admitted that making money is not...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 444, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
... After I read this study I decided that Im not gooing to be a bait for banks or pr...
^^
Line 5, column 70, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ess help satisfy my eager to challenge. Since I was a teenager I used to challenges m...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 245, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...business first, it would generate enough money to buy a house. As a result, I wou...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'so', 'for example', 'in addition', 'in contrast', 'no doubt', 'as a result', 'on the other hand']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.228144989339 0.229887763892 99% => OK
Verbs: 0.17697228145 0.158761421928 111% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0554371002132 0.0866891130778 64% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0405117270789 0.046263068375 88% => OK
Pronouns: 0.100213219616 0.0685040099705 146% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.110874200426 0.118717715034 93% => OK
Participles: 0.0426439232409 0.0351676179071 121% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.65308224785 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0383795309168 0.0309702414327 124% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0831556503198 0.0887237588012 94% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0319829424307 0.0209618222197 153% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00213219616205 0.0139019557991 15% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2371.0 2387.08602151 99% => OK
No of words: 421.0 408.028673835 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.63182897862 5.86048508987 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52971130743 4.48200974243 101% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.342042755344 0.338922669872 101% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.225653206651 0.251872472559 90% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.152019002375 0.174417080927 87% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0926365795724 0.112833075102 82% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65308224785 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 201.0 212.727598566 94% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.477434679335 0.524397521467 91% => OK
Word variations: 52.35050805 59.2087087015 88% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6684587814 121% => OK
Sentence length: 16.84 20.5533526081 82% => OK
Sentence length SD: 33.2939874452 48.84282405 68% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.84 120.699889404 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.84 20.5533526081 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.48 0.644075263715 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.54480286738 108% => OK
Readability: 39.4053206651 45.7405998639 86% => OK
Elegance: 1.20134228188 1.45489161554 83% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.345874793083 0.300154397459 115% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.102678657477 0.103427244359 99% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.071848946697 0.0752933317313 95% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.448209772657 0.497263757937 90% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.127993267354 0.151897553556 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120568875004 0.114077575197 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.070669546436 0.0781384742642 90% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.311755285683 0.336927656856 93% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0559930133689 0.067059652881 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.229014455328 0.210909579961 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0561623361742 0.0618886996521 91% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8870967742 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.86379928315 52% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.91756272401 163% => OK
Positive topic words: 14.0 8.42114695341 166% => OK
Negative topic words: 2.0 2.4623655914 81% => OK
Neutral topic words: 6.0 2.75985663082 217% => OK
Total topic words: 22.0 13.6433691756 161% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.