The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Balmer Island Gazette."On Balmer Island, where mopeds serve as a popular form of transportation, the population increases to 100,000 during the summer months. To reduce the number of accidents involv
The author stated that there are a strong inverse relationship between the number of mopeds rented during the summer months on Balmer Island and the number of accidents which involve mopeds and pedestrians. This association is based on personal opinion, because there is not sufficient evidence to support author´s argument.
First, we need to know more information about the main causes of accidents. For example, are there special cartways where mopeds can circulate? Are there specific rules for moped´s drivers? Or are there traffic signals at the streets of Balmer Island? The number of accidents could be associated with traffic signals inefficiency; therefore, reduce the number of mopeds rented is not the solution to their problem.
Second, author argues that the town council of Balmer Island must reduce the number of mopeds rented from 50 per day to 25 per day during the summer season to diminish the number of accidents, but he don’t give facts to buttress his opinion. The number of mopeds necessary to transport is directly proportional to the number of inhabitants. The population increases during the summer; consequently, there will be a proportional augment in the number of necessary mopeds. If the town council reduces the number of mopeds rented, how will people travel?
Third, author appears to base his argument on a comparison between Balmer Island and Seaville Island, but it is important to know more information about that island, is it smaller or bigger than Balmer Island? How many people live there? Or is there a similar increase in tourist flow during the summer?
On the other hand, one can logically conclude based on the information provided in the passage that Seaville Island is similar to Balmer Island. In the same way, the actions to limit the number of mopeds rented on Balmer Island will produce similar results in the number of moped accidents that those reached on Seaville Island.
In conclusion, there are any gaps in the argument, numerous important variables are absent from the information presented that would substantiate the text; moreover, the author is assuming causal relationships between two pieces of information that are not necessarily true.
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| 2013-10-02 | kishorbhandari23 | 70 | view |
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Pay attention to grammar mistakes:
Sentence: The author stated that there are a strong inverse relationship between the number of mopeds rented during the summer months on Balmer Island and the number of accidents which involve mopeds and pedestrians.
Description: The fragment a strong inverse is not usually preceded by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: This association is based on personal opinion, because there is not sufficient evidence to support authors argument.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to authors and argument
Sentence: For example, are there special cartways where mopeds can circulate?
Description: The fragment For example , is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: The number of accidents could be associated with traffic signals inefficiency; therefore, reduce the number of mopeds rented is not the solution to their problem.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to signals and inefficiency
Sentence: Third, author appears to base his argument on a comparison between Balmer Island and Seaville Island, but it is important to know more information about that island, is it smaller or bigger than Balmer Island?
Description: The word base is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to base
Sentence: For example, are there special cartways where mopeds can circulate?
Error: cartways Suggestion: No alternate word
Total:
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6.0
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 357 350
No. of Characters: 1805 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.347 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.056 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.591 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 164 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 91 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.747 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.372 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.624 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.15 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5