Five years ago, the local university built two new dormitories through different contractors:Aleph Construction and Gimmel Builders. The buildings were nearly identical, though it cost Gimmel Builders approximately 20 percent more to construct their dormi

Essay topics:

Five years ago, the local university built two new dormitories through different contractors:
Aleph Construction and Gimmel Builders. The buildings were nearly identical, though it cost
Gimmel Builders approximately 20 percent more to construct their dormitory. Aleph’s dormitory,
however, has required approximately 10 percent more in maintenance costs per year over the past
five years. Therefore, to construct their new dormitory with the lowest overall cost, the local
university should hire Aleph Construction.

The author claims that Aleph Construction is more cost efficient contractor and that's why the local university should choose Aleph Construction over Gimmel Builders. However, the argument contains some flaws and will not be accepted if it fails to answer some critical question. Moreover, the conclusion dismisses some assumption which is important to draw an accurate conclusion.

Firstly, the author assumes that two buildings were nearly identical that means the materials used were the same quality. But, it is difficult to differentiate by outside look what the materials were used. It can be employed that Aleph Construction used low-quality material and demanding low cost. Therefore, the accessories used like fan, bulb, fitting etc. cannot be compared with the two dormitories because they could be different in quality. Moreover, the area of the dormitories is not clear, range of place and overall size of the dormitories.

Secondly, the author claims that Gimmel Builders demanding 20 percent more to construct dormitory than Aleph Construction. But, without a proper number, it is difficult to say the amount they are demanding which is not accurately expressed by the author. Suppose, Gimmel Builders demands 20 percent extra and their materials are high quality than the Aleph Construction. Moreover, if the new dormitories will construct by Gimmel Builders need to less maintenance whereas Aleph Construction demands approximately 10 percent more in maintenance costs per year. Thus, Gimmel Builders is more preferable than Aleph Construction.

The third issue is the two dormitories built five years ago. So, the author cannot surely claim that the rate will be the same without proper investigation. Because over five years the rate can be changed and their demand might be. Also, it is not compulsory that the local university needs to hire only those two contractors.

To conclude, the author presents the proposal is quite vague and ambiguous. To take further step required more information to implement the proposal.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)
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2019-06-24 Seema Modak 50 view
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 81, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: that's
...n is more cost efficient contractor and thats why the local university should choose ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 429, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...new dormitories will construct by Gimmel Builders need to less maintenance wherea...
^^
Line 9, column 151, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... information to implement the proposal.
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, look, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, third, thus, whereas

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 25.0 55.5748502994 45% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1737.0 2260.96107784 77% => OK
No of words: 318.0 441.139720559 72% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.46226415094 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22286093782 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89234506617 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 169.0 204.123752495 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.531446540881 0.468620217663 113% => OK
syllable_count: 525.6 705.55239521 74% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 22.8473053892 66% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.6030673404 57.8364921388 56% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 86.85 119.503703932 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.9 23.324526521 68% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.45 5.70786347227 95% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.401927649279 0.218282227539 184% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.107612801023 0.0743258471296 145% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.112157957067 0.0701772020484 160% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.174299604926 0.128457276422 136% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.103917604864 0.0628817314937 165% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.3799401198 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 47.79 48.3550499002 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.09 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 98.500998004 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.1389221557 72% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.